The Shiny Headed Prophet

2011-11-09T00:30:00.003Z

Sadly due tio blogger technical problems which blogger seems unable to help with, the very happy relationship dating bate to 2004 is seemingly coming to an end.

I don't really want to, but I have had to, move this blog to a different platform.

The Shiny headed prophet may now be found here

please update your feeds

el azúcar

2011-11-04T23:06:00.001Z

Tonight I had the pleasure of attending the private viewing of Andi's exhibition at Deaf Cat. Andi had taken the Mexican Day of the Dead theme and produced some fantastic and beautiful work - if you are in Rochester at all this week you really need to pop into Deaf Cat to see this amazing work.

Some people without looking may dismiss the exhibition thinking it to be too morbid. But it isn't. It is bright, vibrant and strangely alive. The festival itself is about continuation of life and the celebration of life ... the complete opposite to halloween.

The picture … oh meet El Azúcar, my new monacled sugar skull. I think he looks amazing sitting on my desk, although I need to find a place to show him off proper.

rolling reformation a year on!

2011-11-03T15:40:00.001Z

Yesterday I got to again deacon in a pretty unique (and technically illegal ... sshhh!) service in the Rochester Bridge Chapel. I blogged about the service and experience here last year. The service we used is based on a pre-reformation text and last year the experience caused me to start to think about the idea of a 'rolling reformation' ... trying to capture the idea that we need to be constantly undergoing reformation type acts as language and symbolism changes with time. A year on I find myself feeling this even more strongly as technology and communication seems to be fuelling a language revolution which is constantly morphing and re-morphing as it takes words that I once thought I knew how to use and give them a totally different meaning.

At the time Annie was kind enough to comment, suggesting that the idea of a rolling reformation should not be limited to religion but that the rolling reformation mindset could apply to other spheres of our life.

I liked Annie's comment: 'It is our nature to question and grow and evolve, and it is natural that our faith should do the same - while retaining the central core belief.'

I think that hits the nail on the head pretty much. Our understanding, our language, our expression, our living out should evolve as we grow in our learning and understanding. I wonder if this means it pulls our 'absolutes' to the bear minimum as it throws up in the air how we should live as Christians. Events of history, past (such as the slave trade) and very recent (such as Occupy London), show that our faith and interpretation of the Bible can be very very different and seen from totally different ends of a spectrum with both sides using the Bible in support of their stance.

I talk with a lot of people in my role - it is one of the things I love about this job at this time. I talk with people of no faith, Christians and post Christian. We talk about lots, agree and disagree about lots as well. I guess the thing that is open to debate, as I find in conversation with my new friends is what is, in fact, the central core belief that needs to be retained and what is, indeed, up for the light of a rolling reformation reinterpretation!

soul chat?

2011-11-01T17:08:00.000Z

Last night's pub theo was a pretty special event. Great atmosphere, great people, a fair amount of disagreement and challenge but always laced with a massive amount of respect, care and interest in each others views. If only church could be like this!!

The opening questions was something along the lines of 'So come on then you Christians ... what is so bad about celebrating Hallowe'en?'

The conversation moved around the belief or not of ghosts, spirits, afterlife and in particular of the soul .. and what the soul is, whether it exists, whether it lives outside the body and what happens to the soul upon death. Jade sent in comment via twitter (are you impressed how multi-faceted pub theo can be!!??) saying the body loses approximately 21 grams and asked whether this could be the soul?

The conversation, both face to face, and the via twitter/facebook comments was fairly fascinating and engaging. I've cut and paste some below ... fee free to join in here or on facebook:

Sorry I couldn't be there tonight :( Point to maybe lob into conversation, reportedly at the moment of death the body lightens by 21 grams - the weight of a human soul perhaps?

I think it misses the point to weigh the soul. The soul as the 'ghost in the machine' is a Greek import into Christianity. I don't think the Hebrew faith known by Jesus would recognise it. We have the word 'soul' in English translations of the Hebrew Bible but again it's an import. Belief in the eternal soul allowed Christians to do truly dreadful things to people's bodies. I'm a monist when it comes to anthropology. We *are* our bodies. The soul/spirit are emergent properties of our brains. I believe in the resurrection of the body not the soul's ascent to heaven. The troubling implication of this point of view is that death is truly the end of this experiencing self. And brain injury and disease truly affect our real self. Jesus approached his end with fear and trembling unlike Socrates (a believer in the soul) who took hemlock willingly. I'd be interested to know if this view emerged at Pub Theo. I threw it in when we discussed something similar at PUB:FAITH. Profound and fascinating stuff. Enjoy.

All the energy in the body does not disappear. Energy has to go somewhere even if it dissipates to a thin layer on the earth's surface. The energy in the body is a result of complex chemical generation lending us our personality. Even the body if one thinks of it as our 'matter' has a psychodynamic relationship with our energy. Is all or part of the energy in our bodies representative of the soul?

So ... want to add to the discussion?

take shape

2011-10-31T17:22:00.003Z

I have had the week off.
I have had time to think, to reflect, to read, to watch movies.
I have also done a lot of walking as I 'tweeked' the old back after preaching last week.

As the week unexpectedly opened up for me I decided on one day that my walking should be around the Tate Modern. I love the Tate and, apart from various coffee shops, I really miss just popping in and out of this creative space like I used to be able to when I was a member and working in London twice a week when with YFC.

Personally, for me, I find I hear from God through film and art just as much as I do through Bible study. I find wandering through the galleries of the Tate, and just wandering around the Borough Market area of London to be quite an inspiring space for me, especially when I am feeling dry as I have for the last few weeks.

I found a number of exhibits to be amazing to study. I found myself mentally climbing the stairway. I'm not sure where it is leading, and I'm not sure where I was going as I climbed ... but the piece itself was stunning, captivating and drew you into its space.

I was particularly struck however by an un-named piece by Robert Morris. Morris' piece captivated me and got me thinking as he has exerted minimal control over it's appearance, effectively giving up control of how the art appears. The piece consists of a number of strips of felt which are suspended and allowed to form their own shape under their own weight. Effectively this means that the shape changes each time this work is displayed. The material determines it's own shape.

I was challenged by this as I wondered whether God had a message for me in this for the gathering. Sometimes I wonder whether we try to control things, events, maybe even God, just too much. In our fear to not offend, or in our obsession with accountability, or our ideas on what should and needs to be included, there is a tendency to try to force things into particular moulds.

We have been trying to create something new with the gathering. Some of what we do is very creative and different. Certainly some visitors, who are very very comfortable in the Christendom mould, have not coped with our openness, our inclusivity, our vulnerability and our desire to move forward together, learning from each other and encouraging each other.

What we do, however, still looks like a church service ... a very relaxed and fdcreative one, but still one nevertheless.

I guess when you try to create something new it's hard to break out of the mould that you have grown up with. When you have been so used to doing something one way, and so used to hearing that a b and c need to be included or done in a particular way, it then becomes very different to see any other way to do things.

So I wonder ... whether in some way, and I don't know how, that we need to let the weight of our ideas, our dreams and our passions find their own shape. In order for this to happen we need to find out how we can give them the freedom to relax into their own shape.

I'm not sure we know how to do that ... ... yet!

... space ...

2011-10-21T14:39:00.000+01:00

Due to one thing or another I have fallen behind in keeping up to date with my blog reader. No real excuse, other than I seem to be feeling very tired and quite unenthusiastic for many things at the moment. My writing here is becoming sporadic; I have a desire to write, but do not feel I have anything valid to say at this particular point in time. It's not a painful or bad space to be in .... it's simply a nothing space I guess! But .... I am a firm believer that ides need space to be birthed into .... so I am waiting!

There is some good stuff out there which I have been pleased to catch up with over the past few days.

Near the top of the list is a great Nomad podcast interview with Tom Wright ... well worth a listen. He says some good things about the future .... some people who were quite freaked at pub theology a while back about some views of the future might benefit from listening to Wright's podcast.

There is also a great series here from Jonny Baker ... again well worth a read.

If you are looking for a great Bible resource then people up there in Nottingham have come up with Bibledex. This looks pretty good with a short video introduction to each book of the Bible. I'm sure there are lots of ways to make use of this .... if only I was still a youth worker!

While I inhabit this temporary stage of confusion and un-creativity, I have found the photos of Den and the creations of Zara to be both inspiring and restorative of my faith in the creativity of people.

An I can't forget Naked Pastor ... he keeps me sane and makes me laugh ... especially on October 19th!

few words ...

2011-10-20T09:56:00.000+01:00

'A nations greatness is measured by how it treats it's weakest members' Mahatma Ghandi

(for those outside the UK some context is here and here )

do it anyway!

2011-10-14T10:07:00.000+01:00

This piece of truthful wisdom just seemed to grab, or resonate, with me today:

People are often unreasonable and self centred.
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of alterier motives.
Be kind anyway.
If you are honest, people may cheat you.
Be honest anyway.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.
Give your best anyway.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.

Mother Teresa, 1979 Nobel Peace Prize Laureate

vote for Gillingham YFC

2011-10-11T23:28:00.000+01:00

Many of you will know that my Christian ministry roots really lay with YFC. I will unashamedly say that I think YFC is the best, by a long shot, Christian mission agency working with young people.

I was director of Gillingham YFC for a while and it is now both an honour and a pleasure to be able to work with them in a different way by becoming a trustee.

Why am I telling you all this .... well just by using a few clicks on your mouse you can help Gillingham YFC to be awarded with £6000 from the Nat West Community Force.

With £6000 Gillingham YFC can do more of the good stuff they are already doing .... you can check them out at their website.

But please .... use just a minute of your time and go to the Nat West Community site and vote for Gillingham YFC .... it would be really cool if you did ..... and if you are in Rochester and find me drinking a beer well I'd love to buy you one as a thank you!

Go .... click the link and vote!

sunday reflections

2011-10-10T10:06:00.001+01:00

Sarah was away at the weekend in Florence with friends celebrating Jo's birthday. Sounds like they had a great time.

I did as well! Being home alone with the children (for just a weekend!!) it's quite a cool experience as my children are so amazing. I don't know whether it is true for most children, but in the main, ours will tend to run things past Sarah rather than me. With Sarah away stuff came to me and it was a joy being involved in their lives in a slightly different way.

We also took the excuse to catch up with friends either over takeaways or at Nandos ... and that was great too. I think this was massively helped by myself not being on the rota for Sunday ...

Not being on the rota gave an indication of what life is like for others who do not have a church connection that requires some form of attendance on a Sunday morning. The word that summed up the experience was 'relaxed'. With no rush to get out the door there were no arguments among people and the day was relatively stress free and happy.

With time being so precious today for families, and for most Sunday being the day when families can get together (I know this is not the case for everyone as people work Sundays too ... I know!!) I have been thinking for a while that maybe 'church' needs to view Sunday differently.

With the gathering I am wondering whether our Sunday's together should be more social, with less emphasis and worry on doing something that is worshipful and teaches us ... so that the Sunday can be a 'sabbath' experience where rest, fun, socialising and eating together can be really embraced. I guess to do that though, we would need to take on a commitment to worship at another time during the week, and that could well be costly and difficult itself ... or would it?

Would church on a Wednesday tea time, or a Monday evening really be any more of a challenge than church on a Sunday morning or afternoon? Do we need to think wider than we are ...?

Any comments ....

consumed by truth

2011-10-07T10:01:00.002+01:00

Some people have the gift of praying amazing prayers with poetic language that sometimes transports you to heaven! Neil Thompson, our precentor, is one of those people. Neil led the daily office this morning and during the prayers he said something that I have been mulling over for the last hour and a half or so ... and which I will take into my day today.

I cannot now remember the exact words but the essence was something like:

'Lord, let us not be overly focussed on finding truth, but let our lives be consumed by truth'

A simple line, in a simple prayer, but with great volume and amplitude that seems to penetrate the soul.

As I consider this, lots of questions flood into the mind:
'what is truth?'
'surely truth is in Christ?'
'but what about this ...?'
'...or that?'

I have written, no doubt many times, that people's infatuation with defining, and seemingly great desire to protect, the truth are at the root of a lot of the disunity problems and arguments within the church, maybe even within the world. Certainly, the outspoken supporters of some of the arguments boomeranging around the church at this time do not, on occasions, seem to reflect the love of God which surely will be obvious wherever truth exists?

In my mind, and I acknowledge I have a good chance of being completely wrong, wherever truth exists there must also be love. If, as Christians, we believe God is truth ... well God is love too ... so both must go together.

What is truth?
I don't know?
I'm not sure it is even definable or understandable!
But ... whatever truth is .... I want my life to be consumed by it!

if today was my last day ...

2011-10-06T10:19:00.000+01:00

Bishop Alan blogs about two of the Steve Jobs quotes today. They are both worth pondering.

I was only a little aware that Jobs lived his life out in this way ... and I guess that is why he has been such an influential creative.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "no" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart ...

That is a pretty cool challenge and gutsy way to live
You can read the rest here.

direction

2011-10-05T21:46:00.001+01:00

Today has been one of those slower reflective days. A walk with the dog this morning, and then an hours drive to the Sisters of St Andrew helped me prepare mentally for my time with Sister Diane, my spiritual director. The deal is pretty much that I talk ... and so I needed to think about what I wanted to talk about!

Having an hour with Sister Diane every 6 weeks or so is something that I really appreciate and value. She, like any good spiritual director, listens to a lot of what I say with an enquiring ear and gets me to wonder, or hear, what God may be saying amongst the stress and crap (sometimes) of what is going on. (Life is more of the confusing crappy stuff than the exciting stuff just at this point of time!) She helps me see things in a very different light.

The room pictured is the room we meet in. It is a calm comfortable space where both words and silence seem to be both accepted, nourished and welcome. As Sister Diane says, there is no agenda, the space is here for us to use as we see fit.

Today I was able to reflect over the last few weeks. The highs of Antigua, the lows of an uncertain future, the struggles of wondering what to do next and the frustration of feeling that people really don't 'get it'! (That does not mean people don't ... just that I feel they don't; two different things!). Amazingly, through each of these, after my time at Edenbridge, I am starting to tune into what God may be up to. I'm not there yet - but I can see a way forward, whereas beforehand I was fairly blind to that.

One little exercise that Sister Diane offered was to read the lectionary text for tomorrow before I go to sleep, and then to pick this up again in my head as I pray on the dog walk the next morning. That's an interesting idea that I am going to give a go over the next few weeks. Tomorrows Psalm is 37 and verses 3 - 8 seem to talk powerfully into my situation at present. As I walk tomorrow morning I shall carry these words in my head:

³ Trust in the LORD, and do good;
         Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
⁴ Delight yourself also in the LORD,
         And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

⁵ Commit your way to the LORD,
         Trust also in Him,
         And He shall bring it to pass.
⁶ He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
         And your justice as the noonday.

⁷ Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;
         Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
         Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.
⁸ Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;
         Do not fret—it only causes harm.

Tomorrow I will try not to fret!

the grit of a psalm

2011-10-04T21:54:00.000+01:00

I attended the Bishop's Study day today which was an event for Rochester Diocese clergy. I wasn't sure what to expect, but it was a pretty cool day.

In the morning we had the privilege of listening to Dr. Susan Gillingham, who is pretty much a world expert on The Psalms. Her passion and interest were great to listen to and I think we all gained masses from just listening to the stuff she had to share. Her knowledge of the context in which the 5 books of psalms were written were particularly enlightening for me. Her lectures have inspired me to delve into these songs a little more than I usually would and consider their meanings and usage today.

In the gathering we have written our own psalms in the past. It has always struck me that many of the Psalms are quite gritty and real communication with God. They contain hymns, thanksgivings, laments and even Psalms having a right old go at God. It's true to say they are written in a multitude of emotions.

In the gathering we talk about being more interested in how we believe rather than what we believe. In other words, how we live out our faith, or how we are trying to become Christ like. I think that to live out faith with integrity probably needs us to be real, and by that acknowledging that sometimes life is pretty crap rather than pretending everything is great when it is not.

From todays study day I have rediscovered the gritty honesty of the psalms and wonder whether the writing and reading of psalms may help us to live out our faith in a meaningful way. I can see great opportunity in both personal and communal writing of psalms that might simply allows us to be honest and open in our worship and relationship with each other and with God.

I wonder whether this is something we need to think more about ...

Missional Entrepreneurship

2011-10-03T19:53:00.001+01:00

I'm really looking forward to attending this in November.
My diocese have agreed that I can use my CMD grant to attend this course, which is great as it means they can see the value of this as well.
The title of this module intrigues me and as it is part of the CMS pioneer training course I am looking forward to being able to chat and share with others.
The location looks pretty cool as well!
According to Jonny there are still some spaces ... so if it grabs you too why not sign up for the week?

a beautiful film

2011-09-29T10:21:00.000+01:00

I watched Lars and the Real Girl last night; which I can best describe as a simply beautiful film.

Without giving too much of the plot away, the film is about Lars who develops a relationship with Bianca, a doll that he orders from the internet. Lars takes Bianca to parties and to church. The film outlines how the relationship develops between Lars and Bianca, but more crucially, it shows how the people of the town react and relate to the relationship.

It is the way the people of the town act towards this delusional and awkwardly shy character of Lars that I thought made this film particularly beautiful to watch. It is a great and challenging example of genuine loving community, and more than once throughout the film I wondered what would the world be like if people really could, and did, act like this.

This is not just an example of what honest loving community could look like, it is also an example of what real church could be .... actually is there a difference?

(Thanks Meghan for drawing my attention to this film ... if you had not guessed, I enjoyed!)

1 in 4

2011-09-28T06:07:00.000+01:00

I had my games maker interview yesterday as I have applied to volunteer as one of the 150 or so chaplains throughout the olympics and paralympics.

I was impressed by the organisation and timing of the event. It ran like clockwork, and people were going out of their way to be helpful. If this is an early indication of quality of organisation then people are not going to be disappointed. (well apart from those who are looking for things to complain about)

The interview was fairly thorough and I felt quite tired, as well as excited, after the end of the interview even though it was only around 30 minutes long. I found out just before the interview that around 75% of people applying to volunteer for the chaplain roles will not be offered positions. They have received far more applictions then they thought and I guess, on the above figures, they must have had around 600 people apply to volunteer to be chaplains across the games. I think that is pretty cool.

I'm quite excited about the possibility of volunteering for the Olympics So ... a 1 in 4 chance is not that bad .... so here's hoping. I could know as soon as the end of October.

pub theo

2011-09-27T08:59:00.000+01:00

We saw the first Pub Theo of the new academic year last night. We had around 12/13 people and 4 of them had never been before. One of that 4 had seen the pub theo article in the local press so the paper article got us one new person.

The discussion last night was vibrant, fun, sometimes confusing, but this was all about good dialogue and discussion. People shared some fairly strong views, others challenged, disagreed or asked for clarification and on the whole this was a pretty good night.

The discussion started on the topic of 9/11 and I asked how this had impacted the people around the table as well as asking if faith helped or confused when faced with national tragedies like 9/11 or Utoya. This then branched off into theories about the afterlife to what heaven and earth could be. The discussion flowed well and people seemed to engage with the topics, each other and have a good time.

I'm always slightly saddened at the end of a pub theo session as it means it's a whole month before we can do this again ... not just for the dialogue, but just for the hanging out with some great people too.

Next one is on Monday October 31st from 7.00pm (we always meet up on the last Monday of the month) - maybe see you there!

step OFF the path

2011-09-26T06:17:00.000+01:00

10 days - that's a pretty long time for me not to blog!

Lots has happened. We've been adjusting to a having a dog in the home. I've lost 7 kg in 10 days just from dog walking - thats a faster rate than in the gym last year (and it's a lot cheaper!). I've also met with the Suffragen bishop to start to talk about my future: that did not go s well as I had hoped, but I am not yet worried or despondent! I also met with the person responsible for my ongoing training and we have some stuff that looks good ahead of me.

I have done a lot of walking recently with Skye. A great advantage of walking is the time and space that it gives to reflect. For example, I have started to see the beauty of creation once again in my own back yard as it were. I have started to see that (even) Medway can and does look good!

One reflection I have been mulling over as I walk is the routes that we take. When walking Skye I generally stick to the path that leads from A to B. Skye does not. She criss crosses the path, led by the interest generated in her nose. Whichever scent she picks up she follows. Skye and myself start at point A together and arrive at point B together. We both spend the same amount of time moving from point A to point B. I stick to the path, but Skye just goes everywhere. A conservative estimate is that Skye probably covers, at speed, about ten times the amount of space that I cover.

That got me thinking. I've lived near the Darland Banks for around 14 years. I have walked them many times with the family, always sticking to the path. Skye has been with us 10 days but has already covered more of the area than I have in the last 14 years.

Skye does not know that protocol means you stick to the path, which means she has discovered stuff that others have not and that she has explored things that mere humans like me did not even know were there. In 10 days she has acquired a better understanding of the lay of the land than I have in 14 years!

In faith, in theology, in life ... it does seem that there are rules that we are supposed to follow. We are told that there are paths that we should sick to, depending on what particular flavour of Christianity we come from. But, I have noticed in the last few days while observing Skye that if we stick to the paths things can remain undiscovered. If we stick to the path we are in danger of staying oblivious to stuff that is 'out there', stuff that is useful, edifying and created by God for our pleasure, enjoyment and education and, yes, even to challenge us. If we stick to the path we run the risk of missing out on 90% of whatever it is that is around us.

I guess some people stick to the path through fear of injury or getting lost whereas others stick to the path because that is what they have always done, and it has become a habit. Others stick to the path, because using common sense, it is usually the quickest way to get from A to B. Whatever the reason, if we stick to the path, we will not receive all that is out there to receive.

So as people, as Christians, as people of faith .... maybe we need to stray off the path and discover more of what God has put out there. I mean .... really .... imagine the exciting discoveries ahead of you ...

60 years!!!

2011-09-25T23:08:00.001+01:00

Today was a pretty special day in the cathedral and one that I don't think I will ever repeat again. Today we celebrated the 60th anniversary of John Prior's ordination. I have never heard of anyone celebrating 60 years of ordination before. I can't believe it is a very common occurrence.

John is an amazingly gracious man who simply loves the cathedral, and loves people more. In my mere 3 years here John has consistently been a great support and encouragement to me. That's nothing to do with me - he is a great support and encourager of lots of people. I think what is pretty amazing is that John does not really 'get' what I am about but .... he is still one of the most supportive characters I know, who is always excited just to hear stories. John loves God and loves people. John is one of those few people who you will find no-one to say a bad work against.

Today I had the privilege of being John's deacon as he presided and preached to mark this 60th year. A gracious man, a loved man .... and a man who us young ones would do well to look up to as we wonder how to move forward. I clearly did not know John 60 years ago - but today he is a man who still loves what he is called to do. I so pray that I can still have that attitude in just 10 years time, let alone 60!

Thanks John for being gracious to allow me to share such an exciting time in your life.

pub theo heads page 3!

2011-09-16T19:53:00.001+01:00

The interview I did the other week for the Medway News has been published this week on page 3. On the whole the article is fairly positive and I can thank Max, the reporter, for accurately outline what we aim to do:

'I believe there are lots of people, those with faith and those without faith, who have questions about life and faith and theology - they basically want a safe non-judgemental place where they can chat about that' is a fairly accurate quote of what I said, as is 'it's there to talk, have a laugh, and create community'.

The paper has also accurately reported when we next meet, along with linking to the gathering website which also gives dates for pub theology. So .... it will be interesting to see if we get new people coming in response to this article. I guess on that only time will tell.

meet skye

2011-09-14T22:34:00.002+01:00

So ... our life has changed!

Today I drove to Reading to collect Skye, an 8 month old border collie, who needed a new home.

I met a lovely family who were needing to give Skye up for perfectly good reasons and I did feel quite emotional for them as I drove away with their lovely dog.

Skye has been an immediate hit with everybody in the house but I think she is still in a major sulk with me as I am seen as the person that took her away from her lovely home. I'm sure she'll see me as a friend soon.

This evening we went for a walk with Skye and were amazed to see how beautiful the Medway skyline can look during sunset. Going for a walk at that time of day is not something we would naturally do. but now it is going to become a bit of a habit. I'm quite excited to see what things I will notice as the seasons pass. It was also a joy to walk with Skye, who is amazingly good on the lead ... lots of adventures ahead I think!

Watch this space .... (but regular readers don't worry .... SHP is not about to become all doggy diary and stuff!)

trad ... pioneer ... certainly not boring!

2011-09-12T07:39:00.001+01:00

Yesterday saw an incredibly mixed day that is becoming the norm in the life of a pioneer curate based in a cathedral.

Yesterday was our patronal festival in the cathedral. For those of you that don't know this means we celebrate the life of our patron saint which happens to be St. Mary the Virgin. So yesterday's eucharist service was big and long. New choristers and staff members were resented and accepted on the cathedral foundation. It was also a Kings Sunday which means the scholars from Kings school attend. The service was packed with people, very traditional and we finished at 12.15 which is unusual for the well timed cathedral.

The service was good. God was connecting with people and peopled were being changed in some wat through that encounter.

As it was the 10th anniversary of 9/11 we designed a symbolic installation which gives people opportunity to leave comments and reflect. Over the weekend I have found myself in conversation with people who have found this opportunity helpful and painful. We ended our patronal festival yesterday gathered around this memorial and placed the altar candles there.

The afternoon it was a complete change for me as the gathering gathered in the crypt to look at dance as a topic and ask the question 'what is performance and what is worship'. I think this turned out to be one of the most engaging and fun gatherings we have had for a while.

In John's gospel when asked about worship Jesus says, 'God is Spirit and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth'. We talked about this and thought there was something here about partaking, about integrity and about engagement and transformation. We came to an agreement that it's easy to say that soem styles of worship are performance (e.g. dance, choir, bands), but that these are performance only if we let them be. If we engage with God , even if that engagement is through observation, then it ceases to be a spectator sport and becomes worship.

It was a good time together and we left each other with the challenge of how we ensure that God is the centre of our worship, particularly as we agreed that worship is a lifestyle rather than an activity.

So ... a fairly mixed Sunday but one that serves as a good illustration for our worship discussion at the gathering. Yesterday I experienced many different ways of engaging with God through different services, conversations and activities ... I had a personal preference and enjoyed some more than others .. but I also strongly believe that all were as valid as the others .... it's great we have such a big God who designed lots of different people .... if there was only one way to worship imagine how monochromatially boring that would be!

its about dialogue ...

2011-09-06T13:54:00.001+01:00

It's been an interesting couple of days. One of the local papers has heard about Pub Theology and have been trying to arrange an interview for quite a while now. One reporter came to a pub theology session back in June and seemed to enjoy stuff but for some reason the story never happened.

Yesterday another reporter spent some time with me asking for information so that the paper could write a story about pub theology as 'others may be interested'. Although I am always wary of the press (who is not?) the paper seems genuine and we decided the right thing to do would be to give an interview.

The reporters main interest seemed to be the fact that we were a bunch of people that met to discuss for the pure aim of speaking with and listening to each other, without anyone, whether they have a faith or no faith, trying to convert the other to their way of thinking. The reporter mentioned to me that in other societies he had seen dialogue as the norm but that in this country there were few places for open, agenda free, dialogue. Because of our 'dialogue thing' he was very interested in letting other people know so that they have the opportunity to join in.

I think that sums up pub theology quite well - a place for open, genuinely agenda free, dialogue. In fact I think that pretty much sums up what theology is aboutas well. If dialogue is not agenda free then it becomes debate and debate becomes competition and competition means it is all about being right. Dialogue means it is all about hearing each others views and taking those on board as you (re)form your own opinions.

My experience tells me that you never quote know how things will turn out in the newspaper after things have been edited (sometimes not even by the reporter themselves), but I really hope that genuine open dialogue thing will come through.

... a pioneer?

2011-09-05T20:52:00.001+01:00

Over the summer I have had time to do a lot of reflecting and thinking. I carry with me this grand title of 'pioneer curate'; I'm not too sure I like that title and I'm not sure what people who hear it or see it think. I guess, as a positive, lots of people do ask me (both in and out of the church) what the 'title' or 'description' means. It also worries me, I guess, that so many people within the church ask what it means .... if we don't understand our own language then maybe we need to use language we do understand? (there may be a sermon there somewhere)

Anyway ... what is a pioneer .... funny you should ask as Andrea is writing a great series answering that very question here. Go have a read - well worth it.

Jesus messes you up!

2011-09-02T19:58:00.002+01:00

Went to hear Shane Claiborne the other night in Bromley Baptist Church. Shane was an excellent communicator and I found him both inspiring and challenging. It was refreshing to hear someone on a Christian platform saying it as it is, reminding us that as Christians we are called to be involved in making the world a better place (that's, after all, what building the Kingdom of God is all about).

I particularly related to Shane's comment along the lines of; 'My life was fine, I met Jesus and he really screwed my life up!' To be perfectly honest I feel like that a lot of the time.

Maybe I am jaded or becoming cynical in my old age; but I am really tired of hearing people say from the platform that Jesus will make everything better and that if you follow Jesus your life will be ok. These people forget there are Christians starving in the Horn of Africa, that there are Christians dying from war in Iraq, that there are Christians persecuted in Zimbabwe by other Christians!

Jesus does not take the crap away. Jesus dwells in the crap with you ... that is, actually, what I find quite exciting. The fact that the world is in a mess and yet, rather than washing hands of us, God says ... 'okay, if that's the way they've made it I best go experience it with them!'

Following Jesus, for me has been weird but exciting. I've got involved with ome wacky events, some crazy people. Sometimes I have felt at risk of my life, other times I have laughed until I cried. I have done things, seen things and felt things I would never had done seen or felt otherwise. I have never known what is coming next and at this very point in time most of my life I don't even know what I should be doing now let alone next! Following Jesus is an adventure!

So - yes I agree with Shane, Jesus messed my life up in the choices I have felt led to make since becoming a Christian.
Do I regret this - no!
Would I change any of this - no!
Do I feel sorry for myself because of this - no?
Would I do anything else with my life - no!

I love my life and my role and the family and friends that Jesus has brought around me.

But ... it's still true to say .... if you choose to follow Jesus, he'll really mess your life up!

the 'flavour' of Antigua

2011-08-31T16:50:00.000+01:00

Well ... it's been a few weeks since writing here. Most of you will know this is because of some wonderfully generous friends enabling us to have an amazing holiday in Antigua. This may be my only reflection on my time there, but it may be the first of a few or of many .... I am just not too sure yet!

In a very short space of time I fell in love with the island of Antigua. The island has an incredibly relaxed atmosphere which is difficult for me to explain. Something can be expressed in the words of reggae and heat. Life has a slow rhythmic style due, I guess, to the heat.

I love to people watch and there were a number of things I noticed when watching the people of Antigua. People there seemed to walk proudly and calmly; due to the climate it was mad to rush about and so everything was done at a pace that seemed verrrry slow and took a little time of adjusting to. Some people adjusted to this fairly quickly and others seemed to have difficulty with the slower pace.

I also noticed that people were interested in other people and they would chat for ages, no matter what they were doing, and they smiled easily and regularly. (in fact one of the the first things that hit me when we landed at gatwick was that people rushed and lacked a smile). Antiguan people particularly gave loads of time to children and young people, which hit me as a stark contrats to how children and young people are often portrayed in our media. Children were valued and encouraged.

The holiday was amazing and will be our 'holiday of a lifetime'. The island is a very special place and the 'flavour' of Antigua, which I loved so much, has challenged me in how I should live now I am back home.
It has re-challenged my priorities of tasks vs people.
It has re-challenged my speed and aim of life.
It has challenged me to really consider what is important in life.

Now that I am back I am not embarrassed to admit that I am envious of the Antiguan lifestyle and, in many ways, I wish I could still be there . The people there have managed to maintain something about life, people, relationships and priorities that we seem to have lost in the UK; and I think the most worrying thing is that most of us don't even realise that we have lost them and are aware that there is an alternative. Although, I openly admit, I am not sure what that alternative is other than slow down, re-think ...but our deadlines refuse us that grace!

Sadly I know the feelings and lessons from my time here will fade fairly rapidly as I adjust back to south east England living .... but I pray it does not all go and that I can carry within me some of the islands beauty that simply says 'I have time ........'

Larger churches and fx

2011-08-11T15:49:00.002+01:00

The Church Army's latest research bulletin has some interesting articles and helps with an ongoing discussion. The bulletin is particularly asking:

Are larger churches a help or a hindrance in our mission to reach the non-churched?
Are they a relic from the past, or a vision of the future?
Do they limit maturity or create the right environment for growth?
If we look closely at the numbers, is the numerical growth we see actually hiding the number of people leaving through the back door?
Are there ways they could better cater for those who are struggling?
Is their theology too rigid for people searching for deeper answers?
How does one decide what maturity looks like for church communities; is it individual or relational?

Steve Hollinghurst kicks the paper off by asking, intriguingly, whether we can learn anything from larger retailers and how they have operated in a changing world. He ends by suggesting, rightly in my opinion, that 'a greater diversity of churches is needed, but not a greater commercialisation of them.'

Go have a read here

pray for peace ...

2011-08-09T14:57:00.004+01:00

There's not a lot to say at times like this.
The shock has been well expressed by others.
Those livingn with the reality of the riots are far better placed to make statements than me.

I received this prayer today from the CofE comms update:

A prayer for peace in our communities

Gracious God,
We pray for peace in our communities this day.
We commit to you all who work for peace and an end to tensions,
And those who work to uphold law and justice.
We pray for an end to fear,
For comfort and support to those who suffer.
For calm in our streets and cities,
That people may go about their lives in safety and peace.
In your mercy, hear our prayers,
now and always. Amen

Please pray ....

apostolic living

2011-08-09T06:17:00.001+01:00

I just received a flyer from Affirming Catholicism advertising Apostolic Living, a day being held on 28th January in Southwark Cathedral. It's a grand title and the speaking line up looks to be able to back it up with Paula Gooder, Mark Russell, Mark Oakley and Janette O'Neill. The program looks good but most of all seems to be quite practical in its outlook.

It's looks like I might be hanging out in Southwark Cathedral on 28th January. Anyone fancy joining me?

creating space

2011-08-08T12:47:00.001+01:00

It has been an interesting weekend with a mixture of stuff going on to reflect on.

There was the excitement of having the house to myself while the rest of the family are away. The silence of a house which needs a family to make it home. The fun of setting up camp with those staying at Detling. The pleasure of eating Chinese food with friends. The joy of seeing Gills win the opening game of the season. The frustration with people angry over a temporary change in the BCP eucharist service. The helplessness while watching images of riots in London on the TV screen. The disappointment of upsetting people. The emotion of watching Lovely Bones.

It seems I packed a lot of emotion into this weekend!

Being home alone is a pretty unique experience for me and is probably only the second time this has happened. I hope to use the time to reflect, to read and reflect some more, as well as to really take time to think seriously about how things are going, what I should be doing in the future and where things like the gathering seem to be leading.

I want to hold all of that though in the sentiment and attitude of the Thomas Morton prayer I drew attention to last week. So I am kind of seeking direction while being fairly comfortable with the mystery in which God seems to often chose to leave us. I am conscious, however, that over the last few months time alone and quiet with God has all but disappeared due to changing circumstances ... and so a concerted effort to re-develop a good habit is needed. I intend to try and spend some time sitting and thinking, or 'hanging out' with God. I think I am going to have to work at creating this space to 'ponder'.

One reflection after 3 years of doing what I do is the mild frustration I experience with people that still don't seem to get it. There is always a pressure, some feel, to do, to create, to act, to be proactive, to get 'out there' ... but the waiting rather than racing ahead, the watching rather than doing, the joining in rather than creating, the listening rather than speaking and the serving are the places where I see sparks of the divine. I fail to be able to express the joy I experience when I notice those Godly moments; but I can say I hunger to see them more and more.

So over the next few days I expect to miss the family a little bit, I expect to see some friends, and I expect to spend time in that contemplative way, not necessarily looking for answers but creating that space so that I can have a greater chance of being led by God in what I do - all the while realising there are no guarantees here!

what do I believe?

2011-08-05T13:59:00.002+01:00

Over the last few months I have had some very interesting conversations on my travels both within and outside Medway.

In particular I have found myself in 'debate' with Christians who have a very legalistic view of our faith. I guess I am on sensitive ground here as I don't want to berate or get into the whole 'I'm right and you are wrong' crap that flies around Christianity far too much. But I do, somehow, want to start a dialogue over how we live out our faith. It seems to be that there is a significant section (I have not researched enough to be able to say significant 'minority', significant 'majority' ... so 'section' will have to do) of Christians that will excuse any behaviour by simply saying 'well it is scriptural' or 'it is in the bible'.

The Bible is important. The Bible is the word of God. In that sense I am still a good evangelical; but we still need to ask what does that mean. I mean, when we say this is the word of God, what do we actually mean by that?

Do we mean that these words come direct from the mouth of Creator God and so cannot be altered in any way and are totally, irrevocably 100% to be adhered to the the exact infinite letter? Well ... if we do there is a slight problem of age and culture to get around there. The most recent parts of scripture are some 2000 years old ... and a lot more is older. This means this whole question is not as easy as some people would have us think.

I want to share a little incident from home that is relevant here. Around the dinner table recently one of my children said 'that's sick'. In translation he meant 'it was brilliant, or cool, or amazing'. Only few years ago, 'that's sick' would have meant 'gross, horrible, or maybe ugly'. In the space of just a few years one word 'sick' is being used in a totally different, and maybe even opposite, way than it used to be used.

If we were to write down that conversation and it was read in a few hundred years, let alone thousands of years, would the people have any idea what we were talking about? Would they have to try and second guess what was being said? Would they understand that 'sick' meant 'amazing?'

There are plenty of other word we can use that we may or may not know what people were saying when they wrote them: cool, gay, yellow, slate, slag, waste, ace, acid, dabs, deck, dipstick, pad .... the list can go on and on and on.

I do believe the Bible is the word of God ... but I do also believe it was written by humans who had only the language of their time and culture to be able to express what God was telling them. So, our task in discovering what it means requires that, first, we try to work out and consider what was being said at the time it was written - and that only comes after the complicated process of translation because (shock horror!) the Bible was not written in English ..... not even in 1662 BCP type English! Here a knowledge of the culture and history of the time becomes very helpful, and I would say vital.

For me, as well, there are some clear standards and attributes that go with God and so I believe that what the Bible 'says' should mirror who God 'is'. Surely that must be the case ... mustn't it?

I believe Jesus came to earth and that we can look to Jesus to see what God is like. Jesus being God in flesh is a pretty orthodox Christian belief (100% human and 100% God - too big for my brain to get around ... but God is God!).

From the gospels we that Jesus is compassionate, loving and inclusive. So it follows simply that God is compassionate, loving and inclusive. It then follows in my mind that any interpretation from the bible for relevance today that is not compatible with those values does not fit with who God is. If biblical interpretation does not fit with the character of God then I query whether we have interpreted correctly.

So ... it is not as straight forward as it may seem. I do not believe we can simply say 'the bible says x and so we have to do y' and then believe we are ok and right. I think it is more about finding out what the bible said then in a particular time and culture and why and then bringing that same practice into the here and now and living a way that displays the compassion, love and inclusivity of God. After all ... there is no point being 'right' if the way we live is crap, discriminatory and abusive!

But saying all that ... I refer to my opening remarks ... I could very well be wrong ... and I'd love to know what others who come here think ...

calling ... mary salome and barnabas

2011-08-04T10:17:00.000+01:00

Yesterday I drove Meghan and Luke back to Heathrow and waved bye as they returned to the US and COTA.

The three week placement has gone pretty quickly and as well as now considering 2 people that I did not really know before to be 'friends' it has been a great experience to have Meghan shadowing me for large parts of what I do in Rochester.

Over the last month or so we have chatted a lot and it has been really enlightening to hear another pioneers perspective and observations on what I am doing. We have not always agreed about stuff but the time has, I think, been beneficial and challenging in a positive way for both of us.

For myself it has been really valuable to have someone alongside to share ideas and seek feedback from. In many ways Meghan has fulfilled a 'St. Mary Salome' type role for me: a character that is believed to have been the person that was asking Jesus questions and challenging ... maybe asking 'why do you do this and not this?' (there's a bit of poetic licence there as we really know very little about Mary Salome). In other words Meghan's comments and questions have required me to think about what I do, to remind myself what I am about, and to challenge me to remember what it is that I am trying to achieve. It is also good to hear how a fellow person views and experiences the same situation.

As I said, it has been great having Meghan around. It has supported in my mind the belief that I need two other people to join with me on this journey.

For sometime now in my weekly prayer emails I have been asking my friends to join me in praying for two other people to join me on my travels. I believe these two people may best described as a Mary Salome and a Barnabas character: one remembered for their questioning ability, and the other for their encouragement. So ... I'm still on the look out for these 2 people. If you are the praying kind ... please join me in asking that I may find them soon.

which way?

2011-08-02T15:04:00.002+01:00

Following on from yesterdays post about searching and not really knowing what I am doing, I have been encouraged to see others grappling with the same kind of issue:

Graham posts from Eugene Peterson's Contemplative Pastor:

I don't know what I am doing half the time. I am interrupted, I am asking questions to which I have no answers. I am put in situations for which I am not adequate. I find myself attempting tasks for which I have no aptitude or inclination.'

I think even more helpful was a comment from Ig with this quote from Thomas Merton:

'My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you'.

It's encouraging to know that others have existed in this and do exist in this. It can be frustrating if you are impatient like me. It can also be exciting as we explore whether we are going in the right direction. In our society there seems to be some infatuation about destination which manifests itself in 5 year plans and strategies and so on. Although these are not bad things in themselves I do wonder whether we need to just allow the mystery of God to take a little more control.

I guess the best I can do in my situation is move forward and hope ... and pray that I am moving in the right direction.

the search goes on ...

2011-08-01T17:38:00.002+01:00

Each Sunday night or Monday morning, I put together a weekly email that some very wonderful people receive as they pray for me and what I am doing throughout the week. In my email I outline what I will be doing and when.

I have just admitted in that email that I do not know what I am doing! Now many of you have probably been aware of this for a while, in fact a lot of you will be saying something along the lines of 'well ... no change there then!'

While this used to worry me, I have surprised myself by how relaxed I now feel about this statement.

I might not know what I am doing, but I do know what it is that I am trying to achieve. I don't quite know how to achieve it, but I do have a direction to go in. I don't quite know where that direction is taking me, but there are landmarks to follow.

I started thinking about this last week. A number of people have visited over the last 10 days or so and one asked me an interesting question last week. They asked 'as you do your 'stuff' which character from the bible do you relate to, or think of, the most?'

Without too much thought I responded with Issac, the son of Abraham. It seemed Issac travelled around a lot in the desert. If we read his story in Genesis it is easy to think that he just aimlessly wanders around the desert with no real plan. It was because of this image I had of him that I was drawn to him. But, as I looked more closely I discovered that although Issac does wander looking for pastures for his sheep, he does not wander aimlessly. Instead, he wanders between the wells that his dad, Abraham, had already dug when he wandered the desert. This wells had since beens sealed, so Issac had to re-open them and re-dig them until he found fresh water that he could use for himself. (you can read all about this in Genesis 26)

As I considered more the story of Issac I came to see similarities with my journey. Often my journey seems pretty desert like. But, instead of looking for water, I am looking for something from within christian tradition that needs to be re-dug, rediscovered and reinterpreted for today so that is is as refreshing as good clean water in a thirsty desert. As a pioneer (a term I am increasingly coming to dislike) I am not always looking for something new .... I am looking for something that has been there for centuries, but has merely been buried under layers of christendom, consumerism, modernity, post modernism .... (I could go on...) and needs rediscovering for today.

So ... I am not quite sure what I am doing, but I do know that I am searching ... and I am also looking for others that are searching

the search goes on ...

the upside down kingdom tour

2011-07-29T14:48:00.002+01:00

A little while ago I blogged about Shane Claiborne and his book, The Irresistible Revolution.

I've just found out that Shane Claiborne is touring the UK on the Upside Down Kingdom Tour.

The nearest tour date to me is Bromley on Wednesday 31st August at 7.30pm so I will be trying hard to get along.

I loved what Claiborne writes in his book and I am interested in hearing what he will say at these events .... certainly the 'billing' sounds like it will be a challenging evening:

The prophets have said,
The last will be first and the first will be last.
The mighty will be cast from their thrones and the lowly will be lifted up.
The hungry will be filled with good things and the rich will be set free of their riches.
The people will beat their weapons of war into farm tools. And war will be no more.
If that's what's coming… why not start now?
Join a movement to re-imagine the world. Join a revolution that has been reeking havoc on empires for a couple thousand years.
Upside-Down Kingdom Tour coming to a city near you soon.

Anyone else fancy coming along with me?

Do Christians think before they post?

2011-07-28T10:45:00.001+01:00

I have noticed a 'trait' developing over the last year or so on facebook that has caused me to question. I realise as well that this blog post may well be one of those posts where I get a backlash ... but hey some people will say don't provoke a reaction with what you write then why write!

The trait I have noticed is the status updates of Christian people. Quite frankly I find it difficult to see how Christians square what they believe with what they say in some of their status'. Without wanting to give the impression that I am writing out of a thinking that I am better than others (as those that know me know that I am very obviously not!) I do wonder what is happening and how some people seem to be able to compartmentalise faith and life.

Some examples that have stuck with me over the last few months include status' that range from wanting people who used to be friends to come to harm because they have upset someone, to obscene racism, to jealousy over the success of a rival, to comments along the lines of 'Winehouse deserved to die!'

I am not ashamed to say that some of those status comments have drawn me to tears. Where is the compassion, or the love, or the good news or the empathy that just one reading of any of the gospels flows continually from the mouth of Jesus. What do people looking in think about the Christian faith when they see such stuff?

Jesus calls us to love our neighbour, to turn the other cheek, not to seek revenge, to walk the extra mile, to sell what we have and give to the poor, to join with him in making the world a better place .... and we could go on. Too often we seem to be portrayed as judgemental people that want our own narrow way ... and I wonder if stuff like this goes towards fuelling that view.

So my question, as it says above is ... do Christians think?

As I was considering what or if to write I came across something that Graham found today which seems to resonate with what I am trying to portray... so I have done a cut and paste job below:

If the church were Christian, Jesus would be a model for living, not an object of worship.
If the church were Christian, affirming our potential would be more important than condemning our brokenness.
If the church were Christian, reconciliation would be valued over judgment.
If the church were Christian, gracious behavior would be more important than right belief.
If the church were Christian, inviting questions would be more important than supplying answers.
If the church were Christian, encouraging personal exploration would be more important than communal uniformity.
If the church were Christian, it would care more about love and less about sex.
If the church were Christian, meeting needs would be more important than maintaining institutions.
If the church were Christian, peace would be more important than power.
If the church were Christian, this life would be more important than the afterlife.

And my second question .... is the church Christian?

pub theo ...

2011-07-26T19:53:00.001+01:00

pub theology met again last night in the pub .... well we would wouldn't we!

The general discussion seemed good and we had a number of visitors from other places who were interested in what we were doing and how they might do something similar in their communities. I hope we were able to offer encouragement and a way forward.

I think I have said before that this is one of my favourite things that I am involved in. I think that is because there is no program or hidden agenda here - and it really is becoming a group of friends getting together over a drink (wine, cider, coke, juice, beer) to chat about stuff that is pretty important and/or puzzling to them.

As I look back on the last year it is interesting to notice the subjects that appear regularly. The suffering question is there. The 'why do Christians act so bad' question is there which more often than not expresses itself in how Christians treat other people that they do not agree with. Linked closely to this is the 'sexuality' question, which appeared again briefly last night.

These are important questions but I personally long and pray for a time when people no longer see the need to discuss these issues over and over - not because they are not important (because I personally believe they are).... but simply because people within the church have tuned into the love message of the gospel and acts in an inclusive way in the nature of Christ. (meaning that sexuality and gender are no longer seen as an issue by all).

Pub theology now takes a break for the summer and we will reconvene again I guess some time in the autumn .... that's if people are up for it.

'a voice entirely human yet laced with the divine'

2011-07-26T06:12:00.000+01:00

Here is a great article written by Russel Brand in the Guardian. It is by far the best and most caring article I have read on Amy Winehouse and her sad death.

The article is titled 'we need to review the way society treats addicts' and starts ...

When you love someone who suffers from the disease of addiction you await the phone call. There will be a phone call. The sincere hope is that the call will be from the addict themselves, telling you they've had enough, that they're ready to stop, ready to try something new. Of course though, you fear the other call, the sad nocturnal chime from a friend or relative telling you it's too late, she's gone.

go hear the read it in its entirety.

to comfort all who mourn

2011-07-25T18:27:00.000+01:00

This morning Jean led morning prayer.

I have grown to acknowledge this group of words as being words of value and sustenance.
Today's liturgy included this canticle:

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me
because he has anointed me.

He has sent me to bring good news to the oppressed,
to bind up the broken-hearted,

To proclaim liberty to the captives,
and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;

To proclaim the year of the Lord’s favour,
to comfort all who mourn,

To give them a garland instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
the mantle of praise instead of a faint spirit,

That they may be called oaks of righteousness,
the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.

For as the earth puts forth her blossom,
and as seeds in the garden spring up,

So shall the Lord God make righteousness and praise
blossom before all the nations.

You shall be called priests of the Lord;
they shall speak of you as ministers of our God.

It's a sobre reminder that in confusing and saddening times, that we are called to bring good news, to comfort the mourning ..... in short, to be helpful in thoughts, words and actions.

Following this Jean invited us to light candles which symbolised those who had been killed in Norway as we prayed for the bereaved, the survivors, the nation and those charged with bringing justice in this horrendous case.

We continue to hold the people of Norway in our thoughts and prayers

an exciting day ...

2011-07-25T17:26:00.000+01:00

It's been a bit of a while since I last blogged. There has been a lot going on but one of the highlights was the consecration of Adrian as Bishop of Stepney in St. Pauls Cathedral on Friday.

The day was brilliant and it was a real privilege to see our friend consecrated as a bishop is such amazing surroundings by the the Archbishop of Canterbury.

The sadness and loss still hurt but they are no longer the focus. Our prayers go with Adrian and we share in the excitement that the church has appointed a bishop of the calibre of someone like Adrian.

We shall all be watching with interest to see the great things that will continue with this mans ministry. An exciting day for Adrian and Gill, and exciting day for the London Diocese ... but surely an exciting day for the whole church!

reflecting forward

2011-07-18T20:25:00.001+01:00

I had an interesting journey this morning to the Sisters of St Andrew in Edenbridge to meet up with Sister Diane who I hope will by my new spiritual director.

It was an interesting journey to Edenbridge as this was the location for our pre-ordination retreat 3 years ago before we became deacons. We spent 4 days here in this community as we prepared and thought more about what was happening.

The hours car journey inevitably caused me to reflect on the highs and lows of the last 3 years. I guess I used a vague Ignation model as I looked across the last 3 years of my (ordained) ministry.

I am not too surprised, but I was struck by how a number of 'highs' in the 3 years have been those times when I have got to meet and start to new people. I have counted it a real privilege how certain people have welcomed me as a person, and how we have started to get to know each other and possibly slowly starting that process fo becoming friends. This process has naturally been a two way thing - with people sharing things together, expressing joys, sharing pains which means making ourselves vulnerable, and therefore, trusting each other.

There is something of our humanity that is expressed in this both welcoming and vulnerability that enables relationships and friendships to develop. I think there is something very human and something very divine about this ... and I wonder if in some way this echoes, all but dimly, the trinitarian relationship that is God. I found myself wondering in the car on the way home whether human vulnerability leading to friendship in relationship is a dim reflection of the mutuality of the trinity?

If we are created in the Image of God, can the perichoresis of the Trinity be dimly reflected in some way? And .. if so ... how?

2011-07-18T00:44:00.003+01:00

Meghan has now been on placement with me for 2 weeks and one of the many advantages is that her visit has caused me to think about how I am linked in with other communities and how I am 'sustained' and so tonight we visited the Moot community.

Visiting Moot on Sunday night was an experience like 'coming home' for me. The experience of being back within a community that really 'understands' and 'gets' what I am about because we are all on a similar journey was really quite affirming and strengthening.

I loved my time with the moot community and I hope to be able to start to visit again on a more regular basis. For info and an exciting vision check out the moot video here.

whistle down the wind

2011-07-13T06:38:00.000+01:00

This is coming to the cathedral in September on the big screen.
The cathedral is a great setting to show a movie and I am looking forward to watching this classic is such amazing surroundings.
Why not contact Lynne for a ticket as I reckon they will go quickish.

travelling together

2011-07-12T14:24:00.002+01:00

(great photo from Ed Hall)

Yesterday I traveled to London with Meghan (a great person from COTA spending 3 weeks with us) to meet up with Ian who is my mentor.

We chatted about a lot of stuff and it was a really beneficial time to me as I shared stuff with Ian and listened to his wisdom and take on things. Yesterday we spoke about where the gathering is at, the possible future and what we may need to think about to enable that future to happen. We chatted a fair bit about our identity as the gathering and how this could be aided in its formation with our rhythm of life. It was a great 90 minutes and I felt energised at the end of the time.

Time with Ian in this way causes me to reflect on what is happening and helps me to notice stuff that I would not normally have noticed if I did not reflect. It is also a good time to 'think aloud' stuff I am thinking for the future.

As Meghan was shadowing me with good questions it caused me to think through why I value this relationship so much.

At times through my work Ian has been a lifeline that has kept me sane. At those times when I have felt no one else really 'gets' what I am doing or what I am tying to achieve - it has been a real support to meet with Ian and not have to explain what I am about or try to justify my existence.

At times when I have been so up myself, believing I am the only one who has it right, that I know more than I know, or that I want things to happen, but only on my terms - it has been the realistic, honest and sometimes blunt words of Ian that have helped me regain a realistic and accurate outlook.

At times when I have thought of selling out/giving up and doing something a lot easier it has been the godly words of Ian that have reminded me of what I am called to and of my awareness that it was never going to be easy.

The value of a good mentor is priceless. I can really say that I am still here and still sane because of the time others, notably Ian, have invested in me as a person and friend.

Having a good mentor who is not afraid to be honest is a privilege and is one that I really value .... if you don't have I would really recommend you search one out!

a blessing to others

2011-07-11T07:54:00.000+01:00

The gathering got together on Sunday and we considered Heaven.

We started by looking at our images of heaven, and what we thought heaven was like and what heaven was all about. Nick led us into thinking about if we could describe heaven as a colour, what colour would we choose and why. This was an interesting time as we could see a cross section of colours and reasons ... it's seems we all think very differently about heaven.

Following this we looked at the video of Brian McLaren and his interpretation of the Lords Prayer and heaven. This is a challenging video ... not so much for it's content, but more for its consequences of taken it seriously.

Certainly the concept of heaven coming to earth, and our role being involved in that, certainly sits a lot better with us that thoughts of being whisked off to another place. In the gospels we noticed that John the Baptist spoke of the kingdom of God coming; whereas Jesus says the Kingdom of God is here. That's a pretty distinct difference. Right at the beginning of Mark's gospel (v15) Jesus asks his listeners to believe the good news. I have always blindly read the 'good news' to mean the resurrection story ... but we are 15 chapters away from that still in Mark.

I think the good news that Jesus talks of is that the Kingdom of Heaven is here, that we don't have to wait to be whisked off into another place, and (this is I think really exciting) that we have a role to get involved with God in bringing the KIngdom of God (aka heaven) as a reality in the lives of those we meet. If you watch the video clip that is essentially what a part of the Lords Prayer is saying.

AS the gathering we struggled with what we do in light of this. There is mystery here, the Kingdom of God is here and we can see evidence but it is clearly not ere fully - there is more to come. The kingdom of God is here but there is more to come ... and we have a role in working alongside God in bringing in more of the Kingdom.

Clearly we cannot get involved in every single issue or area of need that we see. But ... we could get involved in those that we feel God prompt us to. I think how this outplays in our lives as individuals and as the gathering will be a reoccurring question. Yesterday we left with two statements which give us a challenge:

to be involved in the kingdom of God would mean that we will be a blessing to those we meet (Luke 4)

and

if we bring in the kingdom with God it would be like leaving a sweet taste in the mouths of those we meet (Psalm 34)

In our daily lives, how can we be such a blessing to others so that it is like leaving them with a sweet taste in their mouth - that's not a bad aim for life!

come to us or go to them

2011-07-08T10:12:00.002+01:00

They come or we go? from Incarnate Network on Vimeo.

I like this video - thanks to Jonny for drawing attention to it on the Pioneer training website.

What do you think?
Do you agree?
Does it annoy you?
Has it challenged you?

politics and faith

2011-07-07T09:17:00.001+01:00

Yesterday was an end of an era as KCME, our formal post ordination training program, came to an end. We are the final year of the course in its current format and we ended in style with a tour of the houses of parliament, eucharist in The chapel of St Mary Undercroft and lunch with Rose Hudson-Wilkin, the chaplain to the Speaker of the House.

I have been happy to complain about KCME, but credit where credit is due - this was a great and well planned day to end the course with - so thanks need to go to Chris, Chris and Trevor.

It was a fascinating day, and the experience fo eucharist in St mary Undercroft was amazing - even for a pioneer like me that usually is pretty oblivious to grandness of the surroundings in which I do my 'stuff'.

It was also a pleasure to meet Rose who became Speakers Chaplain just over a year ago. It was interesting to hear her story and her commitment to be unembarrassed and pro-active about the gospel in the setting of politics and parliament.

I believe Christians need to be involved in the politics of our country (that will not surprise any of you!) and it is great to know that Rose is there, leading our MP's in prayer each day and getting alongside all those working within Parliament. Please remember to pray for her as she develops this exciting ministry.

Oh yeah ... I wanted to make a quip at those leaders and organisations that say our faith is being persecuted in this country .... and yet the Houses of Parliament have a chaplain .... but to bring that up would be shallow and cheap of me !!

protect it .. or live by it?

2011-07-04T05:58:00.000+01:00

I finally got around to watching The Book of Eli the other day. It's another apocalyptic film, a film that depicts the regression of humanity when the bubble of technology bursts.

Without spoling the film too much, Eli (played by Denzel Washington) is carrying the worlds last copy of the Bible which another character, Carnegie (Gary Oldman) is fairly desperate to get his hands on by any means. Some of the scenes are fairly brutal as he attempts to find 'the book'.

There comes a time in the film when Eli seems to give the book away, and his new found friend, Solara (Mila Kunis) expresses her surprise , saying that she did not think anything would be able to make him give up the book. I think Eli's response could be a challenge to the church of today:

'In all these years I've been carrying it and reading it every day, I got so caught up in keeping it safe that I forgot to live by what I learned from it'

Do we, as church, get so embroiled in protecting scripture that we forget to live by its teachings. Have some people become more passionate for protecting the word than they have for the message? I would suggest that some parts of the church have fallen into this and in doing so have lost the central message of the book they protect.

Without wanting to be repetitive .... that would be 'love'.

a mixed day

2011-07-03T20:11:00.000+01:00

Today was both a sad and an exciting day.
Sad for the cathedral and for the Diocese of Rochester.
Exciting for Adrian and the diocese of London.
Today was Adrian's last official day as Dean of Rochester and he really will be very much missed.

On a personal note I could not have asked for a better training incumbent. I have always counted it a privilege to be able to learn at Rochester Cathedral from the whole of Chapter, but it has been amazing to have someone of Adrian's calibre point me in the right direction, support me, challenge me and simply have time for me when I have needed time. I cannot express in words how much I have learned from this man. I will miss his open door, his wisdom and his sense of humour. Most of all I will miss his leadership example which is one of grace, respect and servanthood - a great example to have as a curate and one that I can only hope to aspire too, but dismally fail regularly.

Ww will all miss him hugely, but we are all immensely proud of him and feel honoured that our journey's have crossed foe the time that they did.

Adrian moves on to be Bishop of Stepney which is an amazing role for a pretty amazing bloke.

If you are the praying type - please hold Adrian and Gill in your prayers over these next few weeks.

God's law

2011-07-01T10:32:00.000+01:00

A heard a kind of joke the other day, which isn't really a joke, but I liked it and used it to start my sermon last week. I don't usually do the joke thing at the start of the sermon (no need when most of your sermon is a joke anyway!) but last Sunday I did.

It went something like this:

It involves a group of rabbis. They like to challenge each other. They have various challenges suitable for rabbis. In particular they like to challenge rabbi Gabriel. Gabriel knows too much! Gabriel always has something to say. Gabriel is the one everyone wants to out do. So they call Gabriel over …. ‘our challenge to you is to stand on one leg and recite the whole of God’s law. Gabriel ponders …. and they think they have him …. ‘at last something he will fail at they think’! ….
'too hard a challenge?’ they ask?
'Ok', says Gabriel, and moves into the centre of the circle. He stands on one leg and starts,
‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your mind and with all your soul.
Love your neighbour and yourself.’
He stops hopping, places both feet on the ground, smiles and says ‘the rest is narrative!

There are lots of arguments flying around 'church' at the moment ..... and some people involved in those arguments seem to have lost sight of the core of 'the law'.

The core is love, and if the core is love we are called to love, and if we love then how can we exclude?

God's law is love.

Discuss .....

apocalyptic adbusters

2011-06-29T22:31:00.000+01:00

I don't read many magazines, but by far my favourite, which I subscribe to, is Adbusters. I love the style of writing, the feel of the mag and the challenge. I love that it's not just a mag like other mags full of adverts from companies we pretend are doing us good when we all know that they are ripping us off and harming the world in the process.

This issue has the theme of 'apocalyptic boredom' taking a theme that has been the subject of many a film that seems to have been around recently.

This quote from page 7 grabbed me:

'very few people know that the original greek translation of 'apocalypse' means 'lifting the veil' or 'revelation' ... a disclosure of something hidden from the majority of mankind in an era dominated by falsehood and misconception.

Far from being a horrible experience, apocalypse represents the revealing of the true nature of things. It ushers in an era of forgotten freedoms and unprecedented clarity. This 'lifting of the veil will set us free from the misery that has been the result of our ignorance.'

It strikes me that the greek definition is a definition of hope, a definition of freedom and definition worth looking forward to. The other night at pub theology one thing someone raised was a question of why Christians are so obsessed with who, at the end, will be kept out of heaven and who will be included.

I believe that comes from a misunderstanding of what 'apocalypse;' is about .... a revealing of the true nature of stuff .... maybe not the apocalyptic subject of films like The Road, The Book of Eli, Daybreakers or Red Dawn which give us concern for the future .... but the lifting of the veil that will set us all free

something worth looking forward to then!

what's your biggest regret?

2011-06-28T05:42:00.002+01:00

That's a pretty amazing question to ask people that you do not know - in fact it's probably quite a hard question to ask someone you do know!
I found this video via Cathryn's blog.
It's an amazing video - and some of you may well need a tissue or two as the answers become raw and honest.

It's an interesting question to reflect on ... regret ... not in a negative way but as a way to remind and inspire us to take opportunities of the future.

undignified eating

2011-06-27T06:23:00.000+01:00

I've fallen behind in reading stuff recently but caught up on Maggi's Corpus Christi post recently. It has challenged me in my thinking on the eucharist:

'the word for “eat” in the phrase above – τρώγω (trogo) describes the kind of enthusiastic eating of a hungry animal. Imagine a dog knawing on a bone: teeth bared, mouth wide, getting stuck in for all its worth.' .... go read more here.

Aung Sang Sui Kyi Reith Lectures

2011-06-26T20:32:00.000+01:00

Aung San Suu Kyi will be giving two of the 2011 Reith Lectures on the subject of ‘Securing Freedom’. Her lectures, which were recorded in Burma and smuggled out of the country, focus on the struggle for freedom and democracy, the meaning of freedom and dissent and the responsibility of the international community

Lecture 1 Dissent
On BBC Radio 4
Tuesday 28 June 9am
Repeated Saturday 2 July 22.15

Lecture 2 Liberty
On BBC Radio 4
Tuesday 5 July 9am
Repeated Saturday 9 July 22.15

On BBC World Service
Tuesday 28 June 16.05 (GMT +1)
Tuesday 5 July 16.05 (GMT +1)

The lectures will be repeated on BBC World Service at various times. For full details click here.

mission shaped cathedrals

2011-06-23T14:32:00.000+01:00

Mission Shaped Cathedrals Project Introduction Movie from Episcopal Village on Vimeo.

A little while ago Karen Ward asked if I would be interviewed and talk about what I do to be used as part of an introduction to a mission shaped cathedrals project in America. This is the video that was put together skillfully by Tim and used at the conference.

The video features people at 3 cathedrals: Steve Clarke at Gloucester, Sue Wallace at York and myself. I think it's a good video which gives a good account of what we are trying to do.

mystery

2011-06-21T12:49:00.000+01:00

Last Sunday was Trinity Sunday, and I was on the rota to preach.

I have heard endless sermons that have tried to explain the Trinity. I have heard the Trinity described as something like a jaffa cake, or something like steam, water and ice; or like one person who can be mum, sister and daughter.

I guess there is something in each of those analogies (well maybe not the jaffa cake one!) but I think that sometimes they, and we, miss the point.

God being three and yet one does not make sense. God being three, Father, Son and Holy Spirit is mind boggling. It's a mystery.

In our limited human understanding and vocabulary we are trying to describe a life that is totally outside of our experience or even our wildest dreams. In short, we are trying to describe what is indescribable for us. God is Trinity ... and that's that!

I shared on Sunday a visit I made a spart of my training with SEITE to the Chatham synagogue. We met the person in charge called Gabriel. I had developed a question during the week but now I cannot remember the question; but his answer has stayed with me for nearly 6 years now! He looked at me, shrugged his shoulders and said 'God will be God.' As he said it he gave a look that simply said 'why are you bothering to even ask that? It's a mystery ... it's meant to be a mystery ... God is God!'

Within church, and maybe even in society, I wonder whether we have got bogged down in trying to explain everything. I guess this comes from a need or desire to be in control. In our pondering over trying 'to work it out' we are in danger of missing out on simply enjoying life and being who we were created to be.

AS an illustration I have noticed a big difference between children and adults at art exhibions. In particular I remember the Shibboleth of Doris Salcedo in the Tate Modern a few years ago. Adults looked and tried to explain it, wondering whether it was a trick and how it was made. Children played in it, stuck their hands and legs inside it, and enjoyed it. Adults tried to explain while children accepted the beauty of the mystery.

There is a tension in accepting mystery when you live in a 21st century technological world - but I wonder whether it is a tension we need to relax into so that we can 'enjoy' rather than miss the beauty as we attempt to 'explain'.

change!

2011-06-17T10:37:00.000+01:00

I love change.
Change is what I am about.
Change encompasses the thrust of my role.
For the last 20 years or so I have always had roles where change has been central to what I'm about.
So ... not only do I like change, but I think I cope well with change.

Or so I thought!

It has been an interesting few months. I have found certain things a bit of a struggle but I have not been able to place my finger properly on why. It's not been anything desperate or worrying, but I have been aware that things have not been 'quite right'. I have been unsettled.

While having coffee with a friend the other week she asked me a significant question that resulted in an immediate answer but later resulted in a type of epiphany moment where I saw things differently.

The question was simple, 'Do you cope well with change?' I immediately answered yes but then this thought came into my head which said something like 'yes, that's true I cope with change well and have done over the years because I have been the instigator of change, I have been the person steering change. I have moved from teams and left them to cope with change. There is a lot of 'I' there and I think that is what my friend was causing me to think about.

There is a big change afoot with Adrian leaving to become bishop and for the first time in two decades I am experiencing a change that I have no control over. I have always been the person that has moved on to something new. I have never remained in the same place to experience change as part of a team that I do not lead.

It's an odd feeling, I guess, and I am not sure it is a feeling or situation I can say I enjoy. But ... now that I am aware of it life is back to 'normal'; whatever 'normal' happend to be for any of us.

Being aware of my unsettledness has allowed me to express this through my relationship to God and I guess serves as a reminder that it is God we rely on, God we follow and God who enables us to do whatever it is that God calls us to do.

The next year or so is going to be strange, worrying, uncomfortable and quite exciting ...... as I said; I love change! (but if you are the praying sort - please pray for us all as we go through this transition)

ancient .... future

2011-06-16T10:35:00.000+01:00

On Sunday the gathering well ... err gathered as we do in the Crypt of Rochester Cathedral. The crypt, or more accurately the Ithamar Chapel, was a particularly great setting for us as we were looking at and trying out the ancient practices of Lectio Divina and The Examen. (We used our own version of the Examen which you can find here).

I think this time together for us was good in that it helps us as we 'try to travel our journey of faith together while we listen' as our website claims. Both of these practices, but particularly, for me, the Examen are great ways to connect with the Divine on a regular basis. Personally I use the Examen at either the start or the end of the day and often find myself excited or surprised at how I have met with God throughout normal everyday activities.

These are great ancient practices that can help us on our journey's into the future.

what if Jesus really meant what he said?

2011-06-13T13:58:00.000+01:00

My thoughts have been following a theme recently; particularly since the video I posted on my last blogpost regarding Christians who seem top have lost the plot about who Jesus is, what he stands for and how Christians follow, or don't follow, his example.

My wonderfully helpful mentor, Ian, suggested recently I read Shane Claiborne's Irresistible Revolution. I enjoyed the book but was also made to feel incredibly uncomfortable as it is a thoroughly challenging read.

Thanks to Alice I have been been directed to this interview that Shane Claiborne gave to Esquire magazine when asked to address those who don't believe. He reminds people of what the bible really says which sometimes gets him into a lot of trouble, such as:

'It is so simple, but the pious forget this lesson constantly. God may indeed be evident in a priest, but God is just as likely to be at work through a prostitute ... scripture is brimful of God using folks like a lying prostitute called Rahab and an adulterous king named David.'

As I said I am challenged by his words .... whether you have a faith or not, why not check out this article

As an add on comment, I guess I'm drawing attention to this because I am finding myself challenged in my role as part of the church, the Body of Christ. There is so much we can and should be doing, but we seem to make a mere scratch due to some political worry or other.

I believe the question in the title is a no brainer! Of course Jesus meant what he said ... what I am asking is how do I follow and take those words seriously? I guess it's the old question: 'how can I live out my faith in the way Jesus would if he was here?'

Fan or Follower

2011-06-09T06:02:00.000+01:00

This has been going around the web .... it's funny .... some will find it offensive .... WARNING - 'F' word alert at 1:13 ... for me it kind of follows in some way from yesterday's anger over children .... but today this is about the Christian view of violence ...

As Christians do we take the commands of Jesus seriously, or not ... are we followers or fans?

I'm angry ...

2011-06-08T17:04:00.001+01:00

We live in a mad sick country in a mad sick world!

I was really moved by this program last night. If you are in the UK you can watch it here for the next 6 days in iPlayer. I experienced a mixture of anger and sadness when I heard this (amongst other things):

One in 5 low income families report skipping meals ... that is something 8 year old Courtney experiences every week.
"For tea we have a big version of a sausage roll. I go without dinner when I'm at home but when I'm at school I get free dinners."
Courtney lives with her mother and three sisters. Come the school holidays paying for food for the girls is a struggle without free school meals.

This morning on the BBC website it is contrasted by this story. I'm a football fan .... but this just makes me feel sicker than normal.

This mornings reading in Morning Prayer was 1 John 3 and I read these words:
'How does God's love abide in anyone who has the world's goods and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses help?'

How indeed?
How have we got to a situation where no one bats an eye at a price tag of £20 million for a sports person and yet turns a blind eye to children like Courtney without food, or like Paige who sleeps in a room riddled with damp in which the ceiling collapsed, or like Sam ... or like countless others in our communities ....

I feel angry .... but I guess anger is useless .... instead I need to consider what I can do to help?

meeting Jesus

2011-06-06T08:29:00.000+01:00

I led the monthly Taize service in the cathedral last night. This is a calm, meditative and contemplative service with lots of pauses and silences. I enjoy this service as it allows people to simply take their time with God.

I changed the format a little last night. usually the format is that of chants interspersed by two readings and silences after the readings. Last night I chose to replace one of the readings with a guided meditation which people seemed to find quite powerful. The theme for this month was 'meeting Jesus'.

I used a meditation that I have adapted and used before from a very old youth work book called '40 Devotions that work with Youth' which is a little gem I pull off the shelf now and again. A number of people asked for a copy of the 'Meeting Jesus' meditation and so if you are interested you can download it from here.

ascension reality?

2011-06-02T15:05:00.001+01:00

Today is Ascension Day.
It's not a day I have 'grown up' with from my tradition.
It features more that I am now based at a cathedral.
But ... its is an interesting 'event' and, as Maggi points out, it is an interesting account to approach.

I am not sure what this story is about.
I am not even sure how to explain it.
I'm sure it will mean different things to different people at different times.

I have led morning prayer and the eucharist today where I have been put in a position to have to think a little more about this day and what it means to me.

Today ... I think it challenges me.
As Christ ascended and
'a cloud received him out of their sight'
this story today challenges me to look
above, beyond, ahead.
It reminds me I don't know what is coming
and in that reminder
I become more aware that things won't be like this for ever

It encourages me
to lift my eyes up from the ground
to look towards the sky
to see afresh the beauty of creation
and to dream again of how things could be

It's very easy to become immersed in the everyday
and to lose sight of the reality
that we are part of an amazing creation!

questions rise from the ashes

2011-05-29T14:58:00.001+01:00

The mbs fair in London was, as ever, an amazing experience. I was moved to tears by 'stuff' that people wanted to share and felt incredibly humbled, as well as inadequate, as people trusted me and shared things for prayer. The dekhomai stand welcomes and offers everything as a gift for free as we are very conscious that it is not us helping people but it is Christ working through us. As Jonny said - the energy is only strong on our stand if the risen presence of Jesus is with us ... and I believe he has been.

I was able to wander around the stalls a little bit this year and was interested to see who was there and who has not come back. I also had a few interesting conversations with other stall holders which left me with questions. In particular I remember a conversation with a women running a stand that specialised in native american instruments, clothing and spirituality. I was particularly interested in a Shaman Drum that was painted with a picture of a phoenix.

I am interested in the mythical phoenix creature with it's overtones of resurrection and new life. In our conversation I noted that the phoenix looked like t was singing - to be told I was correct and that the bird was singing a song calling the souls to come home and return to their maker. I guess that birthed a question within me .... could this be God calling his people from with an ancient tradition?

I always find this event amazing, I find it emotionally tiring, sometimes challenging but always I come away with a renewed acceptance that I know and understand so little of our creator God.

Thanks people for the opportunity again to take part - and thanks to those that allowed me to share in their lives for a little while ... may God continue to bless you.

pub theology discussions

2011-05-24T10:01:00.000+01:00

We had another great time at pub theology last night.

The subjects were not as varied in the past possibly because we started the discussions off by asking whether it was right to have killed Osama Bin Laden. This became a wide ranging discussion looking at a range of our differing views on a variety of associated topics.

It sounds strange, because there is no immediate link, but we then moved into a shorter discussion on whether the rise in vampire and werewolf movies is a sign of interest in the after life and spirituality within society or whether they are just good (or bad) films with good (or not!) story lines.

Anyway ... we seemed to have a good time pulling all that stuff apart! As ever, we never came to decisions, i don't think we agreed on much .... but then that is not what it's all about is it!

dekhomai in London

2011-05-23T14:16:00.000+01:00

I am looking forward to being a part of the Dekhomai stand again this year at the Mind, Body and Spirit fair in London. The event runs from 25th - 30th May and I will be there on the Thursday. You can find us on stand 43.

This is an amazing event which is full of spiritual seekers. There is a whole variety of spirituality here that visitors can interact with. Dekhomai offers spiritual resources from a Christian tradition. In the past we have offered Jesus Deck readings, healing prayer, prayer beads, foot and hand massages along with listening. Everything we offer is free of charge.

I simply love this event. I love the way God brings people across each other paths, I love the way people come searching, I love the openness and the acceptance that there is across most of the festival.

If you have not been before and want to experience something different .... maybe see you there!

rap something or other!

2011-05-20T14:38:00.001+01:00

So tomorrow is the day!

According to Pastor Harold Camping, the rapture is tomorrow ... the end of the world!

Funnily I overheard a child telling his mum today that he had heard the raptors were coming back to eat us.

Not sure which is preferable!

I was going to write about this and then saw Maggi has written a great post .... and she is far more intelligent than me and a much better writer ... so go read wisdom over at Maggi's blog.

explore our ancient roots

2011-05-19T19:24:00.000+01:00

Last night the worship guild of the gathering 'met'. This is an open group of people that get together to think about and plan the main monthly gathering. Last night's topic was 'ancient roots'. We speak of the gathering as 'an ancient future church seeking to travel Christian faith together' and so when we were planning topics earlier in the year someone thought we ought to explore those 'ancient roots' together.

Last night we chatted a lot about practices that have helped Christian communities through the ages and then thought about how we might experience then as the gathering. The result will be a slightly different gathering again on June 12th as we seek to 'try out' some ancient practices. Some of these will be experienced as a group, while others will be experienced privately. As always, we will be giving everyone who wishes to the opportunity to contribute what they wish to contribute.

So ... why not come along and try the examen, or spend some time using Lectio Divina, be surprised in what you hear God say through current chart music or even experience the joy of creating something new.

June 12th. 4.15pm in the crypt at Rochester Cathedral .... maybe see you there!

lack of O2 killing me ...?

2011-05-18T15:15:00.000+01:00

I thought yesterday was quite an interesting day if you were an O2 customer. There was a theft, or vandalism (or if you re into conspiracy theories ... MI5 took down the network in connection with terrorist threats to the queen) or something that meant that the O2 network was 'down' for around half a day.

It was interesting because I got sucked into reading peoples comments on the support website. I went to see what the status update was and there were demands after demands for compensation, comments on how disastrous this was, and people very angry because they were unable to send or receive texts. I liked this comment in particular:

Comments = hilarity.
"Send everyone a text to tell them the network is down" - genius, pure genius.
"I pay £25 a month and I want compensation" - What are you going to do with your 83p? Don't spend it all at once!
"I have a child in school" - generations of children went to school every day before mobile phones were invented. Most of them came home in one piece. They'll be fine.
It's almost worth the outage for the funnies. Good work, people - your self-inflicted misery is hilarious!

and this one really did make me laugh:

I have a date tonight and was meant to confirm the time and place... I'm stuck at work with just my phone on me that doesn't work... what am I meant to do... is o2 going to compensate me for lost social life.. or even physical endulgence..

and the most sensible of all:

'shut up ... it's only for one day!'

I was interested by two things in all this -

It seems we are becoming more and more of a 'compensation' culture. The cries for compensation on the support website are loud and numerous numerous, even though the person above asks 'what will you do with your 83p refund?' It seems we have come to expect a service and we don't get that service then we have a right to be compensated. I don't think that is a particularly pleasant side of our culture. I'm not sure what is says about where we are going as people ... apart from always looking to transfer blame for our stresses onto other people. O2 gets blamed for a lot of stuff on the website ... such as a persons decision to leave the arrangements for a date to the very last minute!

More interesting, though, is that it would seem that a large number of people, myself included, have allowed ourselves to become quite dependant on our mobile phones and communication structures. I wrote a while ago about the practice i notice when just sitting around of people, by habit, taking out their mobile phones every few minutes to see if they have missed a message. A friend responded that he felt connected and in community through his phone which is why he often checked. I guess if people feel connected through their phone then that would explain the anxiety for many yesterday ... they were unconnected, they could not text, they could not be texted, they were no longer under the illusion of being in control - they were alone!

Did so many people really feel alone yesterday ... is that why there was so much stress flying around?

a day to contemplate

2011-05-17T09:55:00.004+01:00

I enjoyed meeting old friends at the 'Contemplative spirituality and fresh expressions of church: building contemplative ecclesial communities out of contextual mission' day. (Fraser noted the title was too long to tweet - hence my cyber silence yesterday!)

As always a particular highlight was catching up with old friends and listening to their stories of how they struggle with 'this stuff' in the places they are called to be. It was also exciting to meet new people and hear new stories. I guess my only complaint for the day would be that it was not long enough to enable as much sharing and catching up as I would have liked - but that is not really a criticism as I thought the day was an excellent day and I returned feeling refreshed, challenged, encouraged and reassured.

There was a lot in the day, but some comments i particular that I recorded as I wish to think about them more:

A need to 'receive from the space that only God can inhabit' - David Cherry

'We do not think ourselves into a new way of living, but rather we live ourselves into a new way of thinking' - Ian Mobsby

'Maybe we need to have the courage to let come what is waiting to come' - Ian Adams

I can't say too much in reflection or response at the moment as I need to think on these, and part of the reason for putting them here is so that I don't lose them and maybe hear what you think. Podcasts of the talks will soon be posted on the Moot website so that you can hear them for yourself. If you are interested in this and never knew about the day then you might want to sign up at the fresh expressions of the sacramental traditions website.

Thanks Ian, Ian and others, particularly Lou, who worked amazingly throughout the day so it ran so well.

Krispy birthday

2011-05-16T07:24:00.000+01:00

Great weekend - the highlight being spending Saturday with good friends to celebrate terry's 50th birthday .... in Krispy Kreme ... different we know - which is why we did it!

I know they are a big company and everything and its 'in' now to knock big companies - but the staff, especially Jess, made this an incredibly lovely experience. WE laughed, made doughnuts, drank great coffee, ate doughnuts and laughed more!

If you want a party with a difference which is well run - try out Krispy Kreme! Also, if you are part of a charity check out their fundraising offer where you can buy doughnuts from them cheap to sell at events and make money.

WWJ NOT D

2011-05-12T12:43:00.000+01:00

found this on James Lock via Digging a Lot
It shows the radical Christ we need to be following:

Christ said:
'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your mind'
this is the first and great commandment.
The second is like it
'You shall love your neighbour as yourself'
On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets'

There is a lot of love there!

we gather together to ...

2011-05-11T14:27:00.001+01:00

At Sunday's gathering looking at creation, Howard wrote our opening liturgy which I really enjoyed. I think the way this sounds with the language of 'openness' gives some idea of the sort of community we wish to become: a community that travels together, not pretending to be sorted or having all the answers, and not pretending that things do not hurt, but a community that is open to God and each other.

The gathering 'way' is for half the group to read aloud one line and the other half to respond with the second line:

We gather together to explore
May we be open to see new perspectives
We gather together in awe of the world around us
May we be open to new insights
We gather together confused by things that happen
May we be open to hear new questions
We gather together to be encouraged
May we be open to each other
We gather together to journey
May we have the space to find our path

baptism: i changed my mind!

2011-05-10T06:56:00.000+01:00

Over the last two weeks I have had the privilege opportunity to baptism 4 children, 2 in the cathedral and 2 in a parish church in Gillingham. This were both great events, special events and events where God is clearly at work.

I guess I am writing this here as upon reflection I have been surprised by how my view has changed ... and I don't think I really noticed the change.

A few years ago, and even longer, when I was youth worker at Holy Trinity Nailsea I remember being involved in changing the baptism policy of the church. They baptised everyone that asked for it which a number of us felt was wrong. We decided we should offer thanksgiving services, and then if people wanted to come back for baptism they could after a course of preparation. I think we were wrong to do that ... and I also believe the church in Nailsea has put right our mistake.

I think our concerns were centred around people not understanding, parents not having faith, people not coming to church and so on and so on and so on. I think it came from a (wrong) understanding of having a faith that needed protecting, maybe even with a belief that only people who went to church regularly should have their children baptised... otherwise it would be a mockery.

As I read back through that I shiver! My excuse is that I was a young fiery evangelical man who was a little over exuberant on rules rather than compassion and grace. In my fieriness I had thought too much on what we do at baptism and not enough on what God does.

Baptism is, I believe, a free gift from God. God parents or the person being baptised make certain promises ... but that is only a minor part of what is happening in baptism. Baptism is a sacrament, which may be described as an outward sign of something that God is doing invisibly and mysteriously. The more I reflect the more I am coming to believe that baptism is more about what God does rather than what we do. God plays the major role in some mysterious way that we do not fully understand .... and if that is so, then who are we to deprive anyone from that free gift of God?

So ... I have changed my mind .... I wanted people to know ... as some 'out there' think I would never admit to being wrong ;-)

creation gathering

2011-05-09T14:54:00.000+01:00

the gathering err gathered again yesterday in the crypt of Rochester cathedral to look at the theme of creation.

This was a landmark event for the community as this was the first gathering we have had that I did not curate or 'lead' as one of the families within the community took on responsibility for this.

We took a Godly Play approach to the creation story and people wondered about certain aspects of the story. We then adapted our normal 'open space' approach and had a number of different stations to help people contemplate the theme of creation within our lives. Some of the stations looked at how we are created (Psalm 139) others took a St Julian of Norwich hazelnut meditative approach, others encouraged us to create (using Psalm 8) as well as say sorry for when we have abused creation.

As well as helping us to think more about the creative side of God I think we started to see that we as a community can be a creative bunch of people as well.

The next gathering will be on June 12th with the theme of Ancient Roots

never let me go

2011-05-06T23:27:00.000+01:00

I watched a disturbing film last night at the Other Cinema.

It touched on some harrowing themes around the sanctity of life as the plot centres around the fictional situation of clones being grown to supply major organs for others.

At times I was close to tears, at others frustrated by the lack of action or 'revolt' amongst the characters while at other times i felt quite sick. Throughout the film the 'donors' were told that usually after the 3rd or 4th donation that they would 'complete'. Donors did not die ... they completed ... because they were not really human.

We had a great discussion after this film which drifted to the possibilities and how life is treated or looked at in society today. I guess the question or fear, with the technology for cloning already available and used everyday in agriculture, was how is the current balance on this topic between fiction and real possibility? We are possibly already in a situation where we place different values on different peoples lives - the reactions over Bin Ladens death, the way protestors are treated by police, the values exposed by labels that people give to others ... such as Chav, scally, townie and so on.

This could be a great topic and discussion to take up in pub theology.

Burma: Crisis in Shan State

2011-05-05T13:24:00.000+01:00

Out of site in the ethnic states of Burma, where journalists and diplomats are banned from visiting, the dictatorship has stepped up attacks against ethnic minorities. Last month we received reports from local organisationsin Shan State, Eastern Burma, telling us how the Burmese Army has been gang-raping women, torturing villagers, executing them, and firing mortar bombs into their villages. Many are taken as slaves to carry supplies for the Burmese Army.

With its fake election and release of Aung San Suu Kyi, the dictatorship is trying to fool the world into believing it has changed. But its actions speak louder than words.

The new attacks started when the dictatorship broke a ceasefire agreement with an armed ethnic political party, the Shan State Army North. They had refused to join the Burmese Army, and so they were attacked. And as usual, the Burmese Army targeted civilians, raping, looting and killing.

What is happening in Burma is similar to what has happened in Libya and Syria a brutal regime targeting civilians. But the response could not be more different. On Libya there is international action, on Syria there is international condemnation, but on Shan State, Burma, there is silence.

Help us break the silence, action is needed now!

Please write to the Foreign Secretary, William Hague MP, calling on the British government to act.

Foreign Secretary, William Hague MP

Foreign & Commonwealth Office

King Charles Street

London

SW1A 2AH

Here is a draft letter for you to print and send to the Foreign Secretary:

Your Name

Your Address

The Date

Dear Foreign Secretary,

I am writing to you regarding the current crisis in Shan State and the threat of increased conflict across Burma, which requires immediate international action.

On 13th March 2011 the dictatorship in Burma broke a 22 year long ceasefire agreement with the Shan State Army North. 3,500 Burmese Army soldiers took part in a military offensive in north-central Shan State, an area with a population of 100,000. Sixty-five clashes were reported in the first three weeks of the dictatorship breaking the ceasefire. Civilians are being targeted in the military offensive, with mortar bombs fired at civilian villages. Abuses committed by the Burmese Army include arbitrary execution, arbitrary detention, torture, looting, rape, forced relocation and forced labour. These abuses are violations of international law. Since breaking the ceasefire, abuses continue on a daily basis.

Under the new 2008 Constitution, the Burmese Army is the only permitted armed organisation allowed in the country. The organisations with ceasefire agreements took part in the National Convention which drafted the principles of the Constitution. Every single one of their proposals which would grant some level of autonomy to ethnic states, and protection for ethnic rights and culture, were rejected by the dictatorship.

The British government has repeatedly stated that dialogue is the way to solve political problems in Burma. All armed ethnic organisations in Burma, those on ceasefire, and those not, are willing to enter into dialogue. The dictatorship, however, is once again using violence and military force rather than dialogue. It is also deliberately targeting civilians.

When the regimes in Libya and Syria attacked civilians, you led condemnation and international action. But on the situation in Shan State, and escalatingattacks against civilians in other ethnic states since the elections inBurma last November, you have been silent, and no practical action has beentaken.

I call on you to make a public statement condemning the dictatorship for breaking ceasefire agreements, and the serious human rights abuses it is committing in Shan State, and calling for a nationwide ceasefire in Burma.

The British government should also increase humanitarian assistance to those affected by conflict, including cross-border aid to areas where aid agencies and others do not have access.

Yours sincerely

Thank you for your support.

Anna

Burma Campaign UK

sweep prayers

2011-05-04T22:40:00.001+01:00

Involvement in Dekhomai at the Sweeps Festival was yet again an amazing experience. The team who gave their time worked amazingly together. We designed this postcard for the stall as St Florian is the patron saint of firefighters and chimney sweeps.

Being involved was, for me, a vey humbling experience. People shared deep stuff with members of the team and asked us to pray with them. People seemed to simply want to talk and share. Something I noticed this year more than others was that there was no need to offer prayer ... people simply asked for prayer for a variety of situations.

Although I love working in this way I found it very exhausting this year and I think that was because this year, more than other years, I was moved to tears on a number of occasions due to situations people find themselves in. One family in particular will remain with me for a while and as I continue to pray for them in their desperately horrible situation I continue to shed tears for them.

I look forward to next year when we may do this again (but before then the original Dekhomai will be at MBS London at the end of the month - so I look forward to being there (why not come too!?).

the AV poster that makes sense ...

2011-05-03T06:51:00.001+01:00

confused by AV .... well this makes sense ... simples!

blessed are ....

2011-05-02T08:12:00.002+01:00

I have awoken to a lot of news today flying around and the reactions to those events. There are plenty of people here who are far better qualified to comment on such events and upon the various reactions, not least those who have been personally affected. The celebration of any death, though, does leave me feeling rather cold.

Maybe today, though, could be a day to remember the words of Jesus ...

Blessed are the poor in spirit
for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven

Blessed are those who mourn
for they shall be comforted

Blessed are the meek
for they will inherit the earth

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness
for they will be filled

Blessed are the merciful
for they shall receive mercy

Blessed are the pure of heart
for they will see God

Blessed are the peacemakers
for they will be called children of God

Blessed are those who are persecuted for rigtheousness' sake
for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.

(Matthew 5:3-12)

a welcoming place

2011-05-01T09:08:00.000+01:00

The Sweeps festival is here again and we are again hosting Dekhomai in the cathedral as a safe place to find rest and explore spirituality.

This year we will again be offering foot and hand massages, prayer for healing, blessings, Jesus Deck readings, prayer cords and a chance to simply chill in the special place that is the cathedral. This year as well we are going to attempt to offer 'dream discussions' as an opportunity to explore and talk about dreams that people have and whether there may be any meaning to them.

I've said it before ... but I love the Sweeps festival. The vibe is a good one, people are chilled and interesting in chatting about a load of stuff.

The stall is in the cathedral all over the bank holiday and Sweeps weekend so why not pop in for a free massage or to talk about your dream ....

letter to a 6 year old

2011-04-28T20:29:00.002+01:00

During the run up to Easter and throughout it I fell behind in keeping up to date through boththe blog world and the news ... so I missed this story from the Telegraph publishing a letter from Archbishop Rowan to a six year old girl who wrote a letter to God:

Dear God
How did you get invented?
Love Lulu.

Lulu's dad sent the letter to various heads of churches ... seems only Archbishop Rowan has the time to answer:

Archbishop Rowan's response:

Dear Lulu,

Your dad has sent on your letter and asked if I have any answers. It’s a difficult one! But I think God might reply a bit like this –

‘Dear Lulu – Nobody invented me – but lots of people discovered me and were quite surprised. They discovered me when they looked round at the world and thought it was really beautiful or really mysterious and wondered where it came from. They discovered me when they were very very quiet on their own and felt a sort of peace and love they hadn’t expected.

Then they invented ideas about me – some of them sensible and some of them not very sensible. From time to time I sent them some hints – specially in the life of Jesus – to help them get closer to what I’m really like.

But there was nothing and nobody around before me to invent me. Rather like somebody who writes a story in a book, I started making up the story of the world and eventually invented human beings like you who could ask me awkward questions!’

And then he’d send you lots of love and sign off.

I know he doesn’t usually write letters, so I have to do the best I can on his behalf. Lots of love from me too.

+Archbishop Rowan

This along with his Maundy Thursday challenge illustrates what a toop bloke we have as Archbishop with a great ability to explain theology to a variety of audiences ... thank you Archbishop Rowan!

pub theology

2011-04-27T01:37:00.000+01:00

We had a good pub theo session on Monday - the opening question asking whether post mortem salvation is possible ... can you be 'saved' (whatever that may mean) after you have died?

This led to an interesting discussion on what salvation is about, who God is, and what heaven and hell are ... it was an interesting discussion and I don't think I can do justice to the discussion here .... you'll just have to come to the next pub theo session.

We discussed a few other questions, such as the relevancy and validity of Numbers 5 amongst other things.

I find these discussions invigorating and I guess I think they work well because people bring stuff they are interested in at this point in time. No one really knows what the questions are going to be which I think also adds to the excitement of the evening. I'm looking forward to the next one already ...

the easter gathering

2011-04-26T14:01:00.000+01:00

Easter has been an amazing time ... busy and amazing.
I have been involved in masses of conversations centred around the meaning of things like Maundy Thursday foot-washing, resurrection - conversations that have been made up of lots of questions and interest.

A highlight of Easter for myself was the gathering on Easter morning. At 5am I left the house to set up bbq's on the beach at Upnor. At about 530 other people from the gathering started to arrive and before long there were 18 of us gathered to watch the sun rise and remember the joy of the resurrection of Jesus.

As daylight was breaking we had a time of confession by throwing pebbles into the water, symbolising Christ taking our sins away for ever. After listening to the easter accounts Emily led us in a time of discussion as all were given different parts in the tory and argued over where the body had gone. Some were cast as thieves, some as disciples, others as Jewish leaders and others as Romans. This worked really well and there was something very powerful about being led in this why by one of our amazing young people.

Following this we ate fish freshly cooked on the bbq (John 21) and drank bucks fizz before moving into sharing eucharist together.

As this was happening alongside the calm and quietness of the shore the sun rose and bathed us in light as may be seen in the photos here. As this was happening someone shared what they were noticing:

'as the sun rises we can see that it shines on some places while other places are still in darkness ... but as time goes on the sun shines on everyone and all feel it's warmth'.

I thought that was a great image to carry through Easter Day.

Thank you everyone that was there ... all of us together made this a very special day.

something's different!

2011-04-20T00:42:00.001+01:00

We are in Holy Week and the setting of the cathedral has changed a little.
Neil has had a new altar made which looks stunning in its setting at the centre of the nave.
The chairs have been moved so that we all sit closer to each other and looking at each other - which is pretty major for the cathedral which is used to sitting in rows facing the front which has the choirs and altar separating the congregation and clergy.

I much prefer the st up we have for this week because I think it says a lot about how we as church try to be. Sitting very close and seeing each other can be awkward and strange. Smiles can develop as people look at each other unexpectedly. The sense of closeness and awkwardness says a lot to me about community and family as well as giving just a taste of the awkwardness and confusion that the disciples must have felt in these last few days before Christ was crucified.

If you don't normally come to the cathedral why not drop in and see what you think .... if you want to experience worship in this setting you can see this weeks services here ..... we could always go for a drink after!

back to reality

2011-04-19T22:28:00.000+01:00

We have said goodbye to Cornwall and now we are back.

To be honest it is hard getting into the frame of mind for work again after having such an amazingly relaxing week with really good friends.

I like to reflect on the highs and lows .... but I can't .... the whole week was simply amazing. We chilled, we ate, we chatted, we drank, we surfed, we laughed, we watched sunsets, we saw seals, we fished (I experienced sea sickness for the very first time ... maybe that was a low!), we visited the Eden Project, we wandered around Padstow and my lovely family bought me a painting from Caroline Walker who we met a few years ago. I am now the proud owner of Mother Mary! (although Anglo Catholic friends do not get too excited!!! )

There were some nice surprises and reminders of an amazing God through sunsets and this seal which was a delight to see.

Just such a wonderful week - thanks to the other people I had the delight to share the week with!

Cornwall

2011-04-09T06:05:00.001+01:00

just going to spending some quality time here for the next few days
so it will be quiet over here!

the first to get it ....

2011-04-08T17:48:00.000+01:00

Are you the sort of person who is often the last to 'get it' or are you one of the first? .... and by 'get it' I mean 'understand', be in on what is happening, understand the situation or so on or so on.

On reading the gospel accounts of the crucifixion scene the other day I think I 'got' something for the first time. It seems that the robber who was crucified with Jesus, the one who said:

'Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom'

was the first person to really get what Jesus was about.

This little statement jumped out and grabbed me as I read the whole gospel. To put this in context everyone else was really taking the piss out of Jesus. Are you really the Messiah? ... then do this ... do that .... save yourself ... if you were the Messiah then you would ... Christ was being mocked horrendously. The 'experts' of the law and the religious 'geniuses' were at the forefront of this mocking. The disciples even frustrated Jesus in that they never seemed to understand what he was about, even though they hung out with him all day long.

Out of the centre of this mockery comes this simple statement ... 'Jesus, remember me'.

The others, those that should have recognised Jesus, see the humiliation, the sacrifice and can't believe it is God - they are not seeing what is front of them ... they have lost the plot. The disciples get scared and run away. In their minds this cannot be the Messiah.

The robber, the condemned man hanging with Jesus sees what is happening and he grasps it, he understands. He gets it - this must be the Messiah!

I think we have a scene here that the 'educated', those who should know can learn masses from the outsider, the one on the edge, the distraught, the distressed .... the condemned.

And that got me thinking about myself, and my interactions with people - I find that often people I meet with get Jesus a lot more than others that I know in the church.

I wonder .... what can we learn from Christ from those around us that others may have written off?

a monastic conversation

2011-04-06T23:33:00.000+01:00

I simply had an amazing day today; and I look back on the day and I am not sure whether I am excited or terrified ... and maybe it is a mixture of the two.

I was invited to a conversation that was being held with leaders of traditional Anglican monastic communities and leaders of small missional communities in the CofE that draw on a New Monastic basis. It was in the latter category that I was invited ... in case you thought something had happened that you were unaware of.

I am not sure whether the gathering would call itself a new monastic community or whether we think of ourselves in that way. Certainly as a community we want to be able to live a life of integrity where our actions support our words. We are a missional community that wants to engage with the needs in the community around us. We are quite diverse and yet united by a desire to travel the journey together and we hope we will be able to achieve this, in part, as we develop our rhythm of life. Taking all that together it does sound like we may have some monastic tendencies .... but what we develop into may be something different. Hey ... I don't even know what tomorrow will bring, let alone what we will be next year!

I met up with some good friends today and was able to catch up, and I made a number of new friends which I always enjoy to do.

The format of the day was great. People told their story and in tables we chatted about the story as we sought to learn from each other and hear what is happening. My table had a good mix of people from new monastic and traditional monastic communities - so the conversation was always good.There were two particularly exciting things for me that I noticed throughout the day:

God seems to be saying similar things to diverse groups of people. On my table I had the delight of meeting Sister Mary David from the Benedictine Community of West Malling. She noted that each community, traditional and 'new', was very different but that all were trying to live out a faith authentically.

I was particularly encouraged by each person sharing how small their community was. I guess from the web it is easy to think that things are a lot larger than they really are and this, in turn, can cause you to feel pretty inadequate. As someone involved in a small community I was quite encouraged to hear others being and doing in small groups as well. I was also challenged by others who are living in some pretty scary places and even being shot at for their faith! I am not sure I have the courage for that!

I was struck by a few 'gems' of wisdom during the day:

On our table, I guess, I was keen to learn from those who have been in monastic orders for a while. We had 4 nuns on our table and when asked about sustainability we were given two bits of advice - the need to be flexible and adaptable to what is happening around you in the world and the community and change accordingly. Holding onto things and practices too preciously was not going to be honouring to God. The other 'secret' of sustainability was the need to take risks - a number of the traditional communities have needed to change location or how they work ... and some of those changes have been very risky!

Another 'gem' regarding a rule of life. One sister, Joyce, spoke of the rule of life as 'not a fence but a well to draw from and be refreshed by' while Sister Mary David spoke of it as a 'trellis that helps us to grow and supports us'. I find both of those images both powerful and helpful to myself as I wrestle with 'stuff'.

I've already said the day was amazing. There is a lot we can learn from each other and I am really excited that these conversations will continue in some way. I am also pretty scared .... at what the outcome may entail.

Thanks everyone, particularly Ian and Abbot Stuart, for making this such an amazing day.

blessed

2011-04-05T06:21:00.000+01:00

I have an interesting job.
On occasions I have chance encounters in which I think I touch the divine.
Yesterday I had one such encounter.
It just so happened that before this encounter I was reading The Irresistible Revolution.
My mentor thought it would be useful to read.
In a coffee shop I just finished the first chapter.
It ends with this Mother Teresa quote:
'in the poor we meet Jesus in his most interesting disguises'.

I left the coffee shop and walked thought he cathedral on my way back to the office.
This is my normal routine.
Immediately the stewards directed me to the rear of the cathedral.
A man had come in who had been beaten, mugged, and hospitailised a few days ago.
The guy was clearly distressed and wanted to get home to London.
He had been discharged but had no resources to get home.
I think he was intending to walk home.

He was directed to the cathedral as a place that might help.
That thought brings a tear of joy to my eye.
Someone 'out there' thinks the cathedral is a place of help.

After a little chat I offered to walk to the station and buy a ticket for him.
He accepted happily and we walked together down the High Street.
We talked a lot and the guys life story was a privilege to hear.
He was an HIV counsellor who had lost his job due to funding cuts.
(the politics of cuts are for another post!)

As I walked with the man a verse from the Emmaus story in Luke 24 hit my heart.
'We're not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road...'

My heart burned
I was intrigued by this man's presence.
As I handed over the ticket he shook my hand
He looked me in the eye
held my gaze
and said
'I'll pray for you'

Strange ...
I was going to offer to pray for him

humbled ..
and a little watery eyed ...
I waved goodbye ..
and returned along the High Street

blessed

(not) just another day at the cathedral ...

2011-04-04T13:12:00.000+01:00

Sunday was a great, rather than 'just another', day at the cathedral.

The 10.30, All Age Eucharist, was great fun to be in and, as Bishop Stephen said afterwards 'it had everything that is good about all age worship' in the service. A number of my friends in other churches might say 'big deal' bit for a cathedral this was, and is, a big deal.

The relaxed tone was set by Bishop Stephen for the service. The choir sang amazingly - but I am biased and they were singing my favourite setting - Chilcott's Little Jazz Mass which they sang amazingly (as they always do!)

The service was then taken to another level by Neil who spoke amazingly from the floor and engaged everyone in what he was saying and doing with great amount of serious content as well as humour. Neil was making a cake with different ingredients. To demonstrate that we are all together and equal when he lifted the mixing spoon everyone had to move and sit elsewhere. It was very funny to see the young boys make a dash for the presidents chair on the pulpitum platform. They clearly wanted to be in the limelight (we have an amazing picture but sadly I hesitate to put it on my blog as such things are seem to be unwise in this day and age) and rushed to what they saw to be the 'important' places.

Interestingly, a number of the choirs (as well as myself) chose to sit right at the back of the cathedral. I loved the opportunity to be at the back, not on show and able to see everyone else without being seen for a change. It was a light hearted approach to quite a serious topic.

The look fo joy and confusion on peoples faces was quite good to see - and I think the illustration and sermon brought home a good message. The place was certainly 'buzzing' with joy afterwards!

Burma Update - New Government – Same Dictatorship

2011-04-03T23:03:00.003+01:00

On Wednesday, Burma’s dictator, Than Shwe, officially disbanded the State Peace and Development Council, the body through which Burma’s dictators have ruled the country since 1997. The new President, Thein Sein, was sworn in.

However, the changes are more about rebranding than reform. Dictatorship remains alive and well in Burma, guaranteed by a new Constitution and a new political structure.

The new government is the final stage in the regime’s so-called ‘roadmap to democracy’, following the sham election last November. In reality, it is a transition from military to civilian dictatorship. The new parliament has no real power. Real power still lies firmly with the military and a new all-powerful body, the National Defence and Security Council.

This is history repeating itself. Burma’s first dictatorship began in 1962, led by General Ne Win. Ne Win also introduced a new constitution through a rigged referendum and rubber-stamp parliament.

The real facts on the ground are that there are no new freedoms, that human rights abuses continue, and that those ruling Burma clearly have no intention of introducing any genuine reforms to improve human rights or move towards democracy.

For more details, read our press release here.

sea of sameness

2011-04-01T14:32:00.000+01:00

I love the sea.
I grew up by the sea.
My parents might even say I grew up IN the sea.
My whole teenage life was contained within the sea: fishing, sailing, swimming, canoeing ...
If I could choose any holiday destination it would always be by the sea.
When I am struggling I love to sit in front of the sea.
When I am chilling I just love looking at the sea.
The sea can be my greatest time-waster.

There is something about the vastness of the sea which holds my attention, which draws me and which 'holds' me.
There is something about the immenseness of the sea set against my fragility that is chilling.

I have noticed that I am really drawn into the sea when I find her at her most beautiful.
I think the sea is most beautiful when she is calm and flat, particularly on a bright sunny day or at sunset.

I seem to find the sea at her most beautiful when she is at her least interesting,
flat ... calm ... boring ...
everyday ...
but vast, and captivating, and alluring, and inviting
and did I mention vast
and attention holding yet ...
very samey!
No waves, no ripples even .... just a flat calm sea which looks the same for miles ahead.

In my Lent thinking this week I have been struck by how I am called to work in a sea of sameness -
the same people I talk to each day,
the same places I visit,
the same roads I walk,
the same seats I sit in
.... and yet ....
in this vast sea of sameness that is my life there is amazing beauty.
My sea of sameness is teeming in life with
beautiful incidents,
beautiful people,
beautiful happenings,
beautiful encounters.

In the sea of sameness there is an abundance of beauty to see.

which is closer to Christ?

2011-03-31T15:46:00.000+01:00

One of the other things I have taken on in Lent is to replace some TV time with listening to podcasts. I have just started listening to Jurgen Moltmann podcasts over at Emergent Village. I've subscribed to them on iTunes which is by far the easiest way to listen to them.

The first two podcasts are pretty general interviews to give some background as to where he is coming from and how his theology has come together. In the the later podcasts he gets interviewed in a more focussed way about what he has written.

I have just finished the second interview which displays well Moltmann's clear thinking but also a great sense of humour. When he is asked about his theology of scripture he answers by saying 'church and theologians need to read forward and backward in scripture'. He goes on to say that he reads the bible with the 'supposition of meeting the Divine in human words .... and where there is conflict (for an example here he uses Paul's 'there is no male, no female, no jew, no greek' passage and places it alongside the same writers 'women shall not speak in church') he asks himself 'which sentence is closer to Christ?'

By that I think he means which seems to fit better better with the 'whole' message of the the Bible - the message of love for all, acceptance and redemption.

It's an interesting question that I have taken into my world today .... 'which is closer to Christ?'

Good, and sometimes challenging, food for thought during Lent!

86, 062

2011-03-30T09:05:00.002+01:00

Last night I had the wonderful experience of attending the viewing of 86,062, an amazing exhibition which has been created by Zara and Rikard. You can find the exhibition details on facebook, on the Deaf Cat website as well as on Chatham Girl, Zara's website.

86062 is an exhibition of prints made from the painkillers that have been prescribed to Zara and are a pretty powerful expression of how they have had an impact on her life.

The written word will never do this justice - so you'll just have to visit Deaf Cat yourself!

Does Chrisitianity need to develop a new gospel for today?

2011-03-29T09:29:00.000+01:00

This was the starting question at last nights pub theology. It is an interesting question and kept us going for quite some time. I think it is a fair reflection of the conversation to say some were concerned by the question, some welcomed it and some were just intrigued.

We spoke about the need that some Christians feel they have to 'protect' the gospel and, for that matter, God. I think we came to a kind of agreement that the neither need protecting.

We spoke a bit about what is it in the 'gospel' (a term which we simply used as a name for the Christian message) that people find offensive that brings this question. What is it in the gospel that turns people off, that annoys people and causes us to ask whether it needs to be changed? Simply put the answer seemed to be something like:

'the message that only some are included and if you disagree, or have a certain lifestyle, then you are excluded and not welcome .... unless you change your view, your lifestyle or your sexuality.'

This then took a tangent, an important tangent, to churches being quite quick to condemn, to complain or campaign against things that the everyday world sees as normal and right. The group, which was a collection of people with faith and no faith, all agreed that the church has this image. It's unusual for the people of pub theology to agree - it's quite sad that this is something we can agree on! But ... moving on ...

We chatted about this a lot and were able to see that, actually, the gospel message is one of love, of acceptance and of inclusion. This is seen in those key times when Jesus meets the marginalised of his time. He eats with the tax collector, touches the leper, spends time in the midday sun with the ostricised and shows compassion to those condemned. That's a pretty inclusive way to act.

So I think - and I may be wrong but people who were there can correct me through the comments - we kind of came around to the conclusion that we do not need a new gospel, but we need to realign ourselves with the love message of the gospel. A gospel that champions love rather than hate, lives freedom rather than legality and breathes compassion rather than judgement. That would be quite counter-cultural and attractive in the way the character of Jesus is attractive.

We then moved onto other things in the discussion and the night was a really good night. Interestingly a reporter form one of the local papers joined us as he was interested in the concept and what we are about. I think he enjoyed the discussion as well.

I felt this session was a really good time together. Everyone seemed to contribute as much as they wanted to but, I think more importantly - everyone was having a good time, drinking eating and chatting about questions that we all have. I'm already looking forward to the next one in a month's time!

emotional heartbeats

2011-03-28T15:50:00.000+01:00

The blog has been a bit quiet - I think that is due to Lent. For Lent this year I have been reflecting on 'stuff' and making use of CMS's 40 days of Yes. I know I am a year behind everyone else - but that's the way I like to be!

I don't deliberately give things up at Lent. My psyche works against me if I try to do that - if I concentrate on not doing something I seem to end up failing! Instead, I decide to take something on ... and inevitably in this 'taking on' means I give up time that I was wasting on other things.

I have been challenged by a few things and I think I'm going to start to blog about a couple. Today I have been thinking more about what Rick Warren calls my 'emotional heartbeat'.

I would never ever read any of the Purpose Driven Stuff. I don't know why but the 'driven' language really turn me off, so if it was not for CMS I would not have found this quote from The Purpose Driven Life:

'God has given us each a unique emotional heartbeat that races when we think about the subjects, activities or circumstances that interest us. We instinctively care about some things and not about others. These are clues to where you should be serving .....'

And so I have been asking myself for quite a few days - what is my emotional heartbeat?

At first sight this seems that it should be an easy question to answer but I am finding there are quite a lot of layers to peel through before I can get an accurate answer. There are the answers that I think I should give as a Christian, let along as an ordained person in the Church of England! Then there are the answers which others have told me which bounce around in my mind. There is also all that 'stuff' that was spoken over me as a child from parents as well as a young Christian in churches when I was exploring faith. You can also add the answers that the media, both good and bad, tell me I am passionate about.

I shared recently with Sarah that the Comic Relief is the only thing of its kind that 'grabs me in the gut'. I cannot watch Comic Relief without tears rolling down my face. Even though other campaigns like Children in Need are amazing they don't grab me in the same way. Does this mean my emotional heartbeat is in some way connected to that? I'm not sure - but I don't think so. (I guess this is where my concern with Purpose Driven lies - the language implies an immediate action, to jump to your heart beat ... but I wonder how many people have jumped rather than thought and reflected!?)

So - what is my emotional heartbeat? I don't know ... I'm still 'un-peeling' but in there somewhere is justice and wanting to speak out for the voiceless, and in there is people and wanting to get to know them, and in there is Christ giving people full lives and in there is something else that I can't quite put my finger on yet ...

So .... emotional heartbeats ... and yours is ....?

photo Friday: mother nature

2011-03-25T15:01:00.000Z

This weeks theme is Mother Nature
I was amazed when we found this cavern while on holiday in Yorkshire.
You can see the bigger photo here.

an excellent appointment

2011-03-22T10:59:00.001Z

Today it has been announced that Adrian will be the next Bishop of Stepney.
This is excellent news for the Church of England, and the Diocese of London in particular - although sad news for both Rochester Cathedral and Diocese.

In the short time I have spent with Adrian I have learned a lot and could not have asked for a better training incumbent. It was always clear to many that he would become a bishop - and be an excellent one.

There will be sadness in a few months when we say farewell. Today, however, is a day to celebrate a fantastic church appointment. Congratulations Mr Dean!

London Diocese press release here.